oakeidoakei

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oakeidoakei

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 April 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3642
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About oakeidoakei : Word. Yo.

oakeidoakei's page activity

Visits<b>kyle8211</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 10:47am<b>foreverjordan</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 11:55pm<b>ethangoins</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 10:35pm<b>Marceline_17</b> - the 07/20/2012 at 11:03am<b>alaskankid907</b> - the 11/17/2011 at 2:30am<b>Magic1</b> - the 10/16/2011 at 6:49pm<b>Deloxic</b> - the 10/15/2011 at 8:03pm<b>littlesunshine</b> - the 10/11/2011 at 2:05pm<b>KiddNYC1O</b> - the 09/26/2011 at 10:28pm<b>BballHottie34</b> - the 09/24/2011 at 11:58am<b>Killerturtle</b> - the 09/19/2011 at 9:20am<b>WtfLoser</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 9:16pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 8:45am<b>FrecklesXO</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 10:42pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 9:09pm<b>fighterboy11</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 8:58pm<b>fakeaccountX</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 7:02pm<b>unicornofthesea</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 11:24am

oakeidoakei's FML badges

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You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.

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200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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oakeidoakei's favorite FMLs

Today, during my first date with a girl I've liked for awhile, she tells me about some minor disabilities she was born with. Wanting to be honest with her too, I tell her I'm slightly autistic. Her response was, "I'm sorry this isn't going to work. I can't date a retard." I had to eat alone after that. FML

by DyingPlants / 10/09/2011 at 11:27pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, my car got acquainted with about 3 dozen eggs. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 11:21pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

by xoccerplaya / 10/06/2011 at 6:46am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was supposed to get married but we had to postpone as the best man fled the country. With the marriage certificate and vendor money. Not to mention the rings. FML

by princesspuffypan / 10/05/2011 at 2:23am / South Africa / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

by Username / 10/04/2011 at 8:02pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I logged on to Facebook to find that my boyfriend's relationship status had changed to in a relationship with his ex. I asked him about it, and all he said was, "I guess I forgot to break up with you." FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2011 at 7:03pm / United States / Love

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom tried to diagnose my sickness with advice she'd gotten from a dog magazine. FML

by fml / 09/27/2011 at 3:25pm / United States / Health

Today, I saw my co-worker sneeze into his palm, get up, walk to my desk and smear his hand all over my computer mouse. He then went back to his desk and continued with his work. Last week we had a workplace awareness meeting about my OCD and fear of germs. FML

by gotanewmouse / 09/26/2011 at 6:37am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Work

Today, my 5 year old daughter told me that I needed to stay 50 feet away from her at all times when we were at school, mostly because I didn't hang with the cool parents. FML

by Lolaa123 / 09/25/2011 at 12:03am / United States / Kids

Today, my professor snapped and told me that I know nothing, that everything I've ever learned is wrong, and that all of my former teachers should be shot. FML

by failure / 09/22/2011 at 2:36pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a science test. A question asked, "What is the first stage of photosynthesis?" I didn't know, so just trying to be light-hearted, I wrote, "The plant must first believe in itself." My teacher didn't think it was funny, and gave me detention for insulting her intelligence. FML

by Anonymous / 09/22/2011 at 12:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML

by nicole / 09/22/2011 at 6:31am / Reserved / Love

Today, I had to explain to a woman I didn't know that my husband was killed overseas. She replied, "I know exactly how you feel, my dog died last month." FML

by socks / 09/21/2011 at 3:01am / United States / Animals