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oO_Charmaine_Oo

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oO_Charmaine_Oo
  • Town/Country : Australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 123
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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oO_Charmaine_Oo's favorite FMLs

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56433) - you deserved it (26848)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while in line at my local bakery, an old man passed wind in front of me. The smell was like nothing I've ever experienced before. I managed to withstand it, but the child behind me could not, and spewed orange vomit all over my back. FML

#21104869
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40373) - you deserved it (2559)

On 04/05/2014 at 12:04am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark only to discover it was poo. After further investigation, I find out my younger sister had been wearing them and 'experimenting'. FML

#21104331
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39169) - you deserved it (3586)

On 04/04/2014 at 10:17am - kids - by AshleyP - United Kingdom

Today, I was working at a coffee shop. I was serving a customer when a cockroach appeared out of nowhere, and I screamed. Customers aren't supposed to know about the bugs so I had to lie and say I spilled coffee on myself, and served the customer while I felt the bug climbing up my leg. FML

Today, at my job as a bouncer at a music venue, a guy got his nose broken in a rowdy mosh pit. When I went to help him up and see if he was okay, he said, "It was an accident, please don't kick me out," but the word "please" came out as a hot spray of his blood across my face. FML

#21095237
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35429) - you deserved it (2783)

On 03/24/2014 at 2:53pm - work - by bloodyhell - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to a coffee shop. As I headed over to stand in line, I tripped over my own feet. I got back up, then tripped up yet again. Everyone was staring, and I was so mortified that I went to leave. I then struggled with the door under their glares before realising it opened the other way. FML

#21094549
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38756) - you deserved it (5611)

On 03/23/2014 at 7:02pm - misc - by butterbody - United Kingdom

Today, a tiny worm was wriggling across the screen of my Mac laptop. I tried to wipe it away with my thumb, but it just kept crawling. Turns out the worm lives *inside* my screen, beneath the glass. FML

#21092367
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39865) - you deserved it (3756)

On 03/21/2014 at 1:14am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while mowing, I found a baby bunny and took a picture of it. 20 minutes later, I accidentally ran over said bunny with the mower. FML

Today, my friends hired a male stripper to give me a lap dance for my birthday. It was all pretty nice until he let rip one of the most nauseating farts I've ever encountered, right in my face. Hours later, I can still smell it. FML

#21086642
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44493) - you deserved it (4920)

On 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by polebitch49 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned the worst part about being dared to shave your ass hair: Stubble. FML

#21079543
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34329) - you deserved it (13951)

On 03/06/2014 at 9:54am - health - by DaggerHole (man) - Australia

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

#21076106
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50224) - you deserved it (12047)

On 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm - animals - by Anonytard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, he started sucking on my breast. He ended up popping a pimple on it into his mouth. He threw up and that, as they say, was the end of that. FML

#21064527
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40597) - you deserved it (13907)

On 02/18/2014 at 2:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Virgin Islands, U.S.

Today, and for the third time this week, I found a pubic hair in my soup. I'm currently bed-ridden and can't afford to piss off my boyfriend by complaining. FML

#21054632
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37447) - you deserved it (4366)

On 02/08/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by vey (woman) - China (Beijing)

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

#21053382
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39402) - you deserved it (3185)

On 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Mayotte

Today, I finally finished making my daughter's wedding cake. When I checked on it later, I found a large slice had been cut out. I soon found out that my husband had instagrammed himself eating it, with the caption "#guiltypleasures". FML

#21046154
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44908) - you deserved it (3521)

On 01/31/2014 at 11:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom



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