Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

oO_Charmaine_Oo

Offline (the 10/25/2014 at 3:50pm) | Search for a member

oO_Charmaine_Oo

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 382
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

oO_Charmaine_Oo's page activity

Visits<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 5:43pm<b>Silentshdw13</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 12:44pm<b>greaterdane</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 1:04am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 11:24pm<b>weekendhero</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 10:02pm<b>gAt_d</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:28pm<b>coltonte3</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 5:58pm<b>miglee</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 5:18pm<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 1:06pm<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 10:52am<b>bubba3412</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 9:52am<b>JaceWilson</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 9:09am<b>lurch87</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 8:31am<b>hahatofunny</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 8:01am<b>JuzReading</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 7:37am<b>baba01</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:52am<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:10am<b>Crazymye</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 10:31pm

oO_Charmaine_Oo's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of oO_Charmaine_Oo's badges

oO_Charmaine_Oo's favorite FMLs

Today, I got back from a weekend at my best friend's house. Apparently, he and his friend invented a new game. It involves sticking duct tape to their pubic hairs, ripping them out, and sticking as many as possible on my face and body before I wake up. FML

#21276742
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31185) - you deserved it (3169)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:17am - misc - by wtfguys - United States

Today, I was boxing up all my brother's old stuff to take to the attic. I came across a box, and without checking what was inside, I took it up, just to have it fall on my head, to then find out it was filled with dead baby hamsters. FML

#21276741
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34598) - you deserved it (3224)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:13am - animals - by MissBeyoncé - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML

#21256842
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44852) - you deserved it (5575)

On 09/12/2014 at 9:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

#21237831
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50816) - you deserved it (4910)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by emmamrose7 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

#21236507
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37506) - you deserved it (3419)

On 08/13/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, there are people working in my bathroom. I have the shits. The only place I could think to go was in my cats litter box. I've used it twice and am now contemplating using it a third time. FML

#21220246
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38508) - you deserved it (6623)

On 07/25/2014 at 11:54am - animals - by shewhopoopsinlitterboxes (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at my mom's funeral. My sisters and I were sitting in the front row. The funeral director, whom we had met with twice before, was going around greeting everyone. When she got to us, she asked where our mom was. Seriously? FML

#21189397
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56311) - you deserved it (3000)

On 06/26/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Alex - United States (Hawaii)

Today, less than a day after my cranky downstairs neighbor passed away, I woke up to banging sounds against his apartment ceiling, like the ones he used to make whenever I walked around during the night. I'm shitting myself in fear. FML

#21161740
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44645) - you deserved it (4195)

On 06/03/2014 at 3:01pm - misc - by mdsfkljsfsdrewr (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, as I was standing in line at the checkout, the elderly guy in front turned around and said quietly to me, "Sometimes I shit my pants." He then nodded grimly and turned back around, hitting me with the full force of the stench now coming from his pants. FML

#21158187
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42534) - you deserved it (3652)

On 05/31/2014 at 12:39pm - health - by half-dead in CA (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a pair of eyes looking at me from my closet. Realizing it must be my cat, I called her. She immediately came out from under my bed. I can't find anything in my closet. FML

#21155508
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59100) - you deserved it (4564)

On 05/29/2014 at 2:46am - animals - by Idk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I once again had to tell one of my elderly patients not to grope me. He responded by throwing his bedpan at me. It was full. FML

#21130965
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43081) - you deserved it (3658)

On 05/04/2014 at 10:58pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

#21130490
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41263) - you deserved it (10499)

On 05/04/2014 at 1:17pm - health - by Numbass123 (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48661) - you deserved it (4422)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

#21121912
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42547) - you deserved it (3541)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: