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nulls
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 788
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nulls's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried on the new dress I bought for myself. I, for once, thought I looked pretty all right. I asked my dog, "How do I look?" and she threw up on my pillow. My brother can't stop laughing. FML

#13837705
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22824) - you deserved it (3548)

On 11/14/2010 at 4:42am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boss was watching taser pranks online, when he said he was going to "get me". We often take turns playing pranks on each other, and I was the last to prank him. Now I'm terrified to move or turn my back on anything other than a wall at work. FML

#13801647
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16896) - you deserved it (7652)

On 11/11/2010 at 12:46pm - work - by MrsKSB - United States (Texas)

Today, one of my husband's old college buddies came over for dinner. We reminisced about our college days, and he laughed as he told the story about my husband making up a friend, Marc Deveau, that he'd say he was visiting when he was cheating on his girlfriend. My husband still sees Marc Deveau. FML

#13798665
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54385) - you deserved it (3073) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/11/2010 at 3:40am - love - by Anonymous - France

Today, I was in lying in bed with my boyfriend while he was asleep. He is going to school to be a doctor, and it appears that he says anatomical terms while asleep. My boyfriend can make me feel stupid in his sleep. FML

#13580175
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10477) - you deserved it (19083)

On 10/24/2010 at 7:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend found out I have OCD. When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other or I freak. After I brushed his face with the back of my hand he tackled me to the floor, held me down, and laughed at me while I panicked and tried to touch him with my other hand. FML

#13351667
415 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42286) - you deserved it (13768)

On 10/07/2010 at 2:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, at work, an old lady came through my line to buy some groceries. She told me she lost her purse and was a little short. It was busy, so I pulled out my little purse and gave her the money she needed. A few minutes later she returned with my boss, insisting that my purse was hers. FML

#13204000
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29695) - you deserved it (2623)

On 09/26/2010 at 12:59am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered that I have developed a latex allergy. I'm a third year medical student. FML

#12820970
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28000) - you deserved it (2389)

On 08/30/2010 at 12:18pm - misc - by Sally19863 - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I had to confront my boyfriend after finding a girl's phone number next to my bed. He said I was over reacting. When I told him it was over, he asked for the number back so he could call her. FML

#12748715
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23596) - you deserved it (6263)

On 08/26/2010 at 12:11am - love - by tj - United States

Today, my mother found out that I'm sexually active. She wants me to tell my father. I'm seventeen, and my father still has trouble grasping the fact that I carry a purse, because it means I'm "growing up." This should be fun. FML

#12566093
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25153) - you deserved it (13379)

On 08/16/2010 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by sarskii (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my friends were all sharing sweet things their boyfriends had shared with them. After hearing "he says I look pretty without makeup" or "he promises we'll get married one day", I realized that the only compliment he's given me is that my laughter "sounds like a squirrel having a seizure." FML

#12552157
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26288) - you deserved it (4754)

On 08/16/2010 at 1:03am - love - by 86145 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML

#11966338
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23784) - you deserved it (13640)

On 07/18/2010 at 5:47pm - misc - by anonmys - United States (California)

Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML

#10433872
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34653) - you deserved it (9198)

On 05/09/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by imustbegay - United States

Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML

#9133208
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24882) - you deserved it (6677)

On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States

Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML

#9133208
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24882) - you deserved it (6677)

On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States

Today, I found out my sister has a new boyfriend. That would have been helpful to know 3 hours ago before I told her boyfriend, who is also my best friend, that I loved him. His response? "HAHAHA! Good one! Oh Seriously? Shit." FML

#8765418
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28197) - you deserved it (2700)

On 03/02/2010 at 1:07am - love - by SingleSara. (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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