Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nulls

Search for a member

nulls

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1358
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nulls's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

nulls's favorite FMLs

Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML

#15960632
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34913) - you deserved it (3724)

On 04/28/2011 at 6:28am - misc - by spartanson -

Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

#15833093
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58572) - you deserved it (4401)

On 04/18/2011 at 11:09am - work - by davka -

Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML

#15448080
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34566) - you deserved it (10814)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm - animals - by Username - United States (Florida)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37236) - you deserved it (31527)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML

#15356314
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18234) - you deserved it (82902)

On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I finished and turned in the last of the seventeen major projects for the company I work for. As I was walking out of my bosses office, I hear her ask her assistant "She finished everything we didn't want to do, can we fire her now?" FML

#15356107
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35261) - you deserved it (2685)

On 03/17/2011 at 7:37pm - work - by inpuredeceit (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML

#15333405
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19420) - you deserved it (88809)

On 03/16/2011 at 3:31am - intimacy - by eric - United States

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

#15205288
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52410) - you deserved it (4408) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37629) - you deserved it (23432)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML

#15114672
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36077) - you deserved it (6308)

On 02/25/2011 at 1:36pm - intimacy - by unwantedlove (woman) - France

Today, my professor's son died in a car accident and class has been cancelled until further notice. All my friends were delighted and cheered about it in front of me. I was dating my professor's son. FML

#14922394
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (126101) - you deserved it (5536)

On 02/10/2011 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my brother and father thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by turning on a chainsaw and wearing hockey masks. FML

#14753442
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34042) - you deserved it (4258)

On 01/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by unlucky dudebag - United States (California)

Today, while presenting a project I've worked on for months, one of the professors exasperatedly cut in mid-sentence, saying, "Look, it's shit. Just stop already." FML

#14742599
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29340) - you deserved it (4153)

On 01/28/2011 at 12:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, I rented a copy How To Train Your Dragon for my young son to watch. I put the DVD in, hit play without paying attention, and went off to make lunch. A few minutes later, my son ran into the kitchen screaming. Apparently, there was a mix up at the rental store and I got a copy of Saw IV. FML

#14337359
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39052) - you deserved it (10529)

On 12/25/2010 at 6:21pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my fiancé is going to be deployed on our wedding day. FML

#14161971
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57214) - you deserved it (3899)

On 12/11/2010 at 1:56am - love - by unwed - United States (Michigan)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: