notsoluckypup

Search for a member

Offline (the 01/05/2015 at 8:41pm)

notsoluckypup

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 9 October 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6294
  • Number of comments : 149
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About notsoluckypup : Pup. Chicago/Vegas girl at heart. In love with a guy named Eugene. I love a good laugh from FML. Feel free to drop a line :)

notsoluckypup's page activity

Visits<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 11:10am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 7:41pm<b>fancybest</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 8:43pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 10:13am<b>jill97</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 3:54am<b>moocowmilk0</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 1:48pm<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 3:32am<b>zerolight</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 6:14pm<b>leaandra</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 6:04pm<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 12:44am<b>heyqt</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 4:03am<b>Trollx</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:01am<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 2:59pm<b>cbanana</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 6:09pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:30am<b>54MU31</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 11:59am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 10:40pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 6:01pm

Fucked!<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 9:32am

notsoluckypup's FML badges

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of notsoluckypup's badges

notsoluckypup's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

by whipplewhip / 06/30/2013 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after months of incredibly painful stomach cramps, I convinced my mom that I needed to see a doctor. Not even 2 minutes into the exam, the doctor tells me that I'm heavily constipated and advised some "prune juice" to help "clear all that shit out". My mom won't stop laughing at me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2013 at 11:57pm / United States / Health

Today, I was accused of shooting drugs at work. I was only feeding a baby bird that was tucked into my arm using a medicine syringe. I've been smuggling it to work because it has to eat every 2 hours or it will starve. Now everyone there thinks I'm a hardcore dope fiend. FML

by Gribby / 06/27/2013 at 7:56pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals

Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML

by Rapunzel / 03/18/2012 at 4:02pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

by Brian / 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

by Redhead4life / 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I went to Hooters for lunch. My food was brought to me by a man. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2012 at 1:00pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

by StinkyandStupid / 03/15/2012 at 1:49pm / United States / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She said it's a good thing, because it was a "mutual decision", and that while she wouldn't mind staying together, I was the one who wanted to split, and she respected my decision. I wish I had been a part of this delusional conversation. FML

Today, I called pizza hut to order a pizza. A voice recording was reading me their specials. The man had a horrible country accent so I began to make fun of it. Then I realized it was an actual person on the line. FML

by muzikmaler91 / 03/15/2012 at 5:45am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

by zztopspinner / 03/14/2012 at 3:11pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

by S. Michaels / 03/14/2012 at 11:17am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

by daddy-o / 03/14/2012 at 3:51am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML

by anonymous / 03/14/2012 at 1:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love