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notsoluckypup

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notsoluckypup
  • Town/Country : Las Vegas, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 9 October 1993 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2787
  • Number of comments : 144
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 29 posted

About notsoluckypup : Name's Jacqueline... I also go by Pup - my weird nickname :)
I'm just your "everyday average American teen"...or not. Haha...
Just a girl in high school. Believed to be bipolar and makin' it through life, not much more at the moment. Pretty boring, right?

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Today, I was working retail when a group of older gentlemen came in looking for a good sound system. I showed them a top-range system and gushed about it in detail, trying to close the sale. One of them snorted and said, "See Dave, girls like her are the reason ball gags were invented." FML

#19268166
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17742) - you deserved it (2503)

On 03/12/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by sandi519 (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21401) - you deserved it (4320)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on my dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whirled around and yelled "BOO!" causing me to scream like a little bitch. FML

#19263834
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5031) - you deserved it (22769)

On 03/12/2012 at 10:55am - misc - by gengiskarn69 (man) - United States

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML

#19260782
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18684) - you deserved it (2150)

On 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by me (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I moved out of my apartment by the highway and airport, and into a new place below people who blast loud music, stomp their feet, and slam doors throughout the night. I haven't had a decent night's sleep in over a year. FML

Today, at work at a gas station kiosk, a man requested a carton of cigarettes. We keep our cigarettes on a high shelf. I'm short and very large chested so I have to jump in order to reach the carton. He said, "I only come here for the entertainment" and left without purchasing his cigarettes. FML

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

#19214836
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16689) - you deserved it (17992)

On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML

#19211804
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32955) - you deserved it (19748)

On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, I was suffering from a persistant, irritating itch on my butthole. Worried, I took a picture with my iPhone to get an idea of what was causing said itch. I never found the source, but my Mum and grandmother did, on the iPad. Thanks, Photo Stream. FML

#19208526
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9906) - you deserved it (23222)

On 03/03/2012 at 11:12am - health - by Buttscratcher (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23015) - you deserved it (6919)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I went to help a friend move into her new apartment. We were half-way through when it started to rain, and in my anger I yelled that it's like these things happen just to annoy me. Then we heard the tornado sirens. FML

#19203363
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15817) - you deserved it (2469)

On 03/02/2012 at 4:15pm - misc - by wtf did I do - United States

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (127) - you deserved it (2726)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML

#19091480
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15675) - you deserved it (3596)

On 02/16/2012 at 2:43am - animals - by parkertownparadise (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML

#19088946
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12830) - you deserved it (24586)

On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

#19063795
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26494) - you deserved it (1601)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:03am - health - by loveinanelevator (man) -



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