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notsoluckypup

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notsoluckypup
  • Town/Country : Las Vegas, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 9 October 1993 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2790
  • Number of comments : 144
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 29 posted

About notsoluckypup : Name's Jacqueline... I also go by Pup - my weird nickname :)
I'm just your "everyday average American teen"...or not. Haha...
Just a girl in high school. Believed to be bipolar and makin' it through life, not much more at the moment. Pretty boring, right?

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notsoluckypup's favorite FMLs

Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML

#19301577
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22130) - you deserved it (1868)

On 03/18/2012 at 4:02pm - misc - by Rapunzel (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20575) - you deserved it (3267)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

#19296318
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18299) - you deserved it (1658)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to Hooters for lunch. My food was brought to me by a man. FML

#19288594
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19152) - you deserved it (10419)

On 03/16/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19938) - you deserved it (910)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

#19282725
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5694) - you deserved it (22132)

On 03/15/2012 at 1:49pm - misc - by StinkyandStupid - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She said it's a good thing, because it was a "mutual decision", and that while she wouldn't mind staying together, I was the one who wanted to split, and she respected my decision. I wish I had been a part of this delusional conversation. FML

#19281871
93 comments

Today, I called pizza hut to order a pizza. A voice recording was reading me their specials. The man had a horrible country accent so I began to make fun of it. Then I realized it was an actual person on the line. FML

#19281634
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4290) - you deserved it (29573)

On 03/15/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by muzikmaler91 - United States (Georgia)

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

#19277345
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8068) - you deserved it (21545)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:11pm - misc - by zztopspinner (man) - United States

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

#19276990
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19359) - you deserved it (2151)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:17am - misc - by S. Michaels (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22496) - you deserved it (12957)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML

#19275580
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20637) - you deserved it (10889)

On 03/14/2012 at 1:18am - love - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got back to work at my hospital after some sick leave. The first jackass to waste my time was a guy with leg lacerations. This, he claimed, was because he tried to break a samurai sword over his leg as part of a bet. It's day one and already I want to kill myself. FML

#19274332
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12476) - you deserved it (4174)

On 03/13/2012 at 10:32pm - work - by Simms (man) - United States

Today, I woke up sweating and gasping for air after having a terrible nightmare. The nightmare involved my deceased mother-in-law bitching me out for being a bad influence on her daughter and threatening to cut my nuts off. Even in death, she won't leave me be. FML

#19270798
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18950) - you deserved it (1495)

On 03/13/2012 at 12:13pm - misc - by lanu (man) - United States

Today, I got my yearbook. My sister and I are identical twins, and we realized only my sister had a picture in it. When we asked the head of yearbook, they said they thought it was the same girl trying to get two pictures, so they put in the prettier one. FML

#19269452
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30546) - you deserved it (1425)

On 03/13/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Rynne S. - United States (Colorado)



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