notsoluckypup

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Offline (the 01/05/2015 at 8:41pm)

notsoluckypup

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 9 October 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6482
  • Number of comments : 149
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About notsoluckypup : Pup. Chicago/Vegas girl at heart. In love with a guy named Eugene. I love a good laugh from FML. Feel free to drop a line :)

notsoluckypup's page activity

Visits<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 11:10am<b>SuperDani</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 7:41pm<b>fancybest</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 8:43pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 10:13am<b>jill97</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 3:54am<b>moocowmilk0</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 1:48pm<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 3:32am<b>zerolight</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 6:14pm<b>leaandra</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 6:04pm<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 12:44am<b>heyqt</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 4:03am<b>Trollx</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:01am<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 2:59pm<b>cbanana</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 6:09pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:30am<b>54MU31</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 11:59am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 10:40pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 6:01pm

Fucked!<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 9:32am

notsoluckypup's FML badges

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notsoluckypup's favorite FMLs

Today, I found tiny little maggots in the bristles of my toothbrush. I have no idea how long they've been there. FML

by wombats / 09/28/2013 at 10:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

by SerenityJ / 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2013 at 1:23am / United States (Ohio) / Geek

Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML

by heyhijello / 09/09/2013 at 6:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

by down trodden / 09/05/2013 at 3:45am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I explained to my roommate that if she kept using all of our kitchen utensils as sex toys and hoarding them because of the varying degrees of orgasms she could achieve, we wouldn't be able to cook or eat in our own house. FML

by Palindromesque / 09/04/2013 at 5:07am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

by ugh / 09/03/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, my dad told me I was folding my laundry all wrong. I said with a smirk, "A little clothes-minded, are we?" He slapped me. Hard. FML

by fml / 09/03/2013 at 2:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was teaching my chickens to eat out of my hand, one of the hens bit my finger and I dropped the entire handful of treats. Result: bonanza for the bird. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML

by Rapunzel1974 / 09/01/2013 at 12:29am / United States (Mississippi) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

by aly55a_mariie / 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I let my son take my car out for a spin, since he just got his licence. He didn't make it out of our street before totaling it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2013 at 10:22am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

by Blood on my hands / 08/07/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Animals

Today, I was reading in my apartment. Due to a heatwave and my lack of AC, I was completely naked. My cat jumped onto my lap, and as her claws dug into my stomach, I recoiled. This caused her to retreat, clawing at my nether regions in the process. My pussy mauled my pussy. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 5:18pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was doing stand-up comedy at open mic. The guy I like started laughing, but before I hit my punch line. Apparently, when I was speaking, I was occasionally spitting, and in the very bright light it was easy to see my spit hitting people in the face. They kept a tally. FML

by sucker and suckatash/say don't spray / 07/17/2013 at 6:06am / United States (Hawaii) / Love

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

by anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Texas) / Animals