Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nothing92x

Search for a member

nothing92x
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2523
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nothing92x's last visitors

MacItUpdeathpostsCamBenRuler3000IrishGirl12KazuTrumpet1512Clumsyblonde22jedidesaudenneeni88Garrett184

nothing92x's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of nothing92x's badges

nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML

#5515193
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45051) - you deserved it (4449)

On 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by screwwyou (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML

#5497361
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31131) - you deserved it (3087)

On 09/27/2009 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was offered a position as a school crossing guard. I have a $200,000 degree in Economics from a top 20 University and was offered a position to hold a stop sign and wear a reflective vest. I was tempted to accept. FML

#5465384
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31734) - you deserved it (5822)

On 09/25/2009 at 12:11pm - work - by UnemployedGrad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was searching for a travel bag. I looked in my parents room for one. I found one alright, with all there sex toys in it. FML

#5464453
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14964) - you deserved it (4883)

On 09/25/2009 at 10:37am - intimacy - by R-R-R-Ray (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I played with a boomerang my first time. I didn't believe that when you threw it, it comes right back to you. It flew back all right. And broke my nose. FML

#5450785
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9069) - you deserved it (36909)

On 09/24/2009 at 5:39pm - misc - by BOOMerang (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML

#5443972
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54866) - you deserved it (2087)

On 09/24/2009 at 5:50am - misc - by scaredtosleep (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went online to check my credit report. My credit report says that I am deceased, and have no rating. I'm at least 90% sure that this is not true. FML

#5419647
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31174) - you deserved it (1530)

On 09/22/2009 at 8:27pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my soon to be mother-in-law sent me a birthday present. It was a necklace for me to wear at my wedding. The pendant is a well known lesbian symbol. I'm a woman and I'm marrying her son. FML

#5392687
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33405) - you deserved it (2433)

On 09/21/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by whasian (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I wasn't feeling too good, and took my temperature. I had a fever, which I told my boyfriend who was laughing hysterically when I told him. I asked him what was so funny, turns out he's been using the thermometer to take our dog's temperature sometimes. Rectally, of course. FML

#5332273
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35305) - you deserved it (4807)

On 09/18/2009 at 1:48pm - health - by anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was arguing with one of my professors. She said that all married couples fight and I told her that my parents have never argued or fought about anything. When I got home my parents told me that they're getting a divorce. FML

#5288032
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36362) - you deserved it (10819)

On 09/16/2009 at 4:38am - misc - by omgstfuplz (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I am still coughing. I was diagnosed with whooping cough last week, which apparently cannot be treated. Basically, it appears I'm a 19th century English peasant. FML

#5286391
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32188) - you deserved it (3641)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:33am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriends lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

#5136668
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18397) - you deserved it (3976)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:26pm - intimacy - by awkwardbf (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was arguing with my dad. I called him a geriatric fool. He replied with, "Well at least I know who my biological father is." I have no idea if he's joking. FML

#5107055
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45187) - you deserved it (6642)

On 09/07/2009 at 3:19pm - kids - by Waheyyy (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my mom noticed the hickey that I have on my neck. Embarrassed, I tried convincing her that I burnt myself using a hair straightener. She then told me that that's the same excuse she told my grandma when she got a hickey. FML

#5086359
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10085) - you deserved it (40405)

On 09/06/2009 at 5:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: