Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nothing92x

Online | Search for a member

nothing92x

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6973
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nothing92x's page activity

Visits<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 2:42pm<b>FalloutScrolls</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 2:41pm<b>mutiplyyou</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 1:44pm<b>s3kShUn47</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 11:21pm<b>KayleyBaby37</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 8:17pm<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 7:55pm<b>BigL99</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:41pm<b>bab3ruthl3ss</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:36pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:39am<b>Ajwc95</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:36am<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:28am<b>Lacalema</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:38am<b>styles829</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:57pm<b>gracehi</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:47pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:38pm<b>MalcolmRodrigues</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 4:13am<b>reburkah</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 7:36pm<b>drunk_crow</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 6:12pm

Fucked!<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 7:28am<b>gracehi</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:47am

nothing92x's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of nothing92x's badges

nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, my son and I attended my mother's funeral. It was the first time he'd been to such an event, so to ease his grief and distract him, I turned on Max and Ruby when we got home. He quickly broke into tears; apparently, it was the episode where Max and Ruby prepare their grandma a special birthday gift. FML

#14950396
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32080) - you deserved it (4513)

On 02/12/2011 at 1:57pm - misc - by sadcartoons (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it looks like I may have an STD. My fiancé and his friends went to Vegas two months ago. He says he's been completely faithful. They say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Turns out that's not quite true. FML

#14882919
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42043) - you deserved it (4181)

On 02/07/2011 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by anonomous - United States (Florida)

Today, it looks like I may have an STD. My fiancé and his friends went to Vegas two months ago. He says he's been completely faithful. They say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Turns out that's not quite true. FML

#14882919
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42043) - you deserved it (4181)

On 02/07/2011 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by anonomous - United States (Florida)

Today, I flirted with a guy for ten minutes before realizing I was sitting between him and his girlfriend. FML

#14881953
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11062) - you deserved it (38752)

On 02/07/2011 at 12:41pm - love - by Lindsay (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML

#14843192
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32582) - you deserved it (7348)

On 02/04/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by omnomnom (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML

#14843192
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32582) - you deserved it (7348)

On 02/04/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by omnomnom (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend finally got a Facebook account. Too bad she doesn't know the difference between a wall post and a message. She just described how much she enjoyed our sex last night, in great detail. My mom liked it. FML

#14790156
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50033) - you deserved it (8363)

On 01/31/2011 at 5:46pm - intimacy - by anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, as I went into my calculus class, the teacher announced that someone had received a negative grade on the test we were getting back. I laughed and said, "Which f*cker managed to get a negative?" Turns out I'm the dumbass. FML

#14770555
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9396) - you deserved it (54808)

On 01/30/2011 at 4:24am - misc - by terrible kenny - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML

#14677100
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38541) - you deserved it (13950)

On 01/22/2011 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

#14671725
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52959) - you deserved it (4840)

On 01/22/2011 at 8:00am - intimacy - by fmlalways - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

#14610612
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44299) - you deserved it (3011) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML

#14605764
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56488) - you deserved it (4429)

On 01/16/2011 at 9:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my husband I want to lose the baby weight I put on with my recent pregnancy, and once I succeed I will go on a clothes shopping spree. To this he remarked, "So either way I'm spending money; either on food or on clothes." FML

#14550598
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22359) - you deserved it (9892)

On 01/12/2011 at 3:23am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad told me he had been seeing someone for a while and has decided to marry her. When I met her, her son looked familiar. I lost my virginity to him. FML

#14460417
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44788) - you deserved it (5381)

On 01/04/2011 at 5:56am - intimacy - by LoveMyNewBro -

Today, I realised it takes me longer to take a dump than it does to have sex with my boyfriend. I also realised taking a dump is more satisfying. FML

#14442840
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37571) - you deserved it (6151)

On 01/02/2011 at 8:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: