Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nothing92x

Offline (21 hours ago) | Search for a member

nothing92x

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5855
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nothing92x's page activity

Visits<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 1:19am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:02am<b>james98e</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 1:44am<b>sophzxc</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 12:25am<b>LPRZ17</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 9:39pm<b>KJxFTW</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 1:30am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:45pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:45am<b>MacItUp</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 3:55pm<b>deathposts</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 2:58am<b>CamBen</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 1:04am<b>Ruler3000</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 10:51pm<b>IrishGirl12</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 9:22am<b>ghiman</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 6:58am<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 11:59pm<b>Clumsyblonde22</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 9:32pm<b>Anner22</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 7:31pm<b>jedidesauden</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 1:20pm

nothing92x's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of nothing92x's badges

nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were role playing when her mum walked past the slightly open door, saw me, and chased me out of the house for stealing her baby's innocence. I was only wearing a red speedo. FML

#12775979
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12181) - you deserved it (33593)

On 08/27/2010 at 7:16pm - intimacy - by yeah - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while I was on a date, I noticed my ex-boyfriend in the restaurant, and he looked sad. So I walked over to see him and jokingly said, "You look like your mom died or something!" She had. FML

#12712941
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14944) - you deserved it (48227)

On 08/24/2010 at 12:21am - love - by perfectlybrokenx - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47048) - you deserved it (14841)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I discovered a bat in my new apartment. I found him in my shoe... with my foot. FML

#12583063
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32421) - you deserved it (3237)

On 08/17/2010 at 1:09pm - misc - by Bruce (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

#12524990
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38493) - you deserved it (2693)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by incestastic - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was supposed to be going on my first date with a guy I really liked. He never showed up. I just found out my dad was outside washing the car when my date showed up. He told him he didn't have a daughter and to never show up on his driveway again. FML

#12376475
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41158) - you deserved it (2860)

On 08/07/2010 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, I was called handsome. Too bad it was coming from a trashed homeless lady, who then went on to tell me that she "likes my lips and wants to rape me." FML

#12304319
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40436) - you deserved it (3841)

On 08/04/2010 at 3:58am - intimacy - by IllJustGetYouASweaterThen (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my wife of 2 years told me she was pregnant, after we've been trying for ages. Excited, about to call my parents, my wife then told me, "Don't get your hopes up it might not be yours, the father could be 5 other guys." And then asked me what I'd like for dinner. FML

#12277666
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55483) - you deserved it (4197)

On 08/03/2010 at 12:07am - intimacy - by Cheated (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought my girlfriend an expensive chihuahua puppy because she was never allowed to have one as a kid. She was so excited and happy so she leaned in to give it a kiss. It bit her in the face, she had to get stitches, and they put the $500 dog to sleep. FML

#12192420
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37331) - you deserved it (7270)

On 07/29/2010 at 7:13pm - money - by Joseph (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

#11989675
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61049) - you deserved it (3780)

On 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States

Today, I found out what's worse than having the "sex talk" with your parents: having the "sex talk" with your boyfriend, when he's 23, right before you were supposed to have sex. FML

#11977645
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33989) - you deserved it (5071)

On 07/19/2010 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Bellagirl (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, it's my 18th birthday. I was telling my friends a story when my mom started talking. I simply said 'Mom...' so she'd realize she interrupted me. She gave me the finger and called me rude in front of all my friends. FML

#11923492
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31141) - you deserved it (5687)

On 07/16/2010 at 3:38pm - misc - by apple (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I got a speeding ticket. I wrote a check, and on the way to deposit my fine, I got another one. I put both fines in a box down town, and I turned around to see a cop putting a parking ticket under my wind-shield wiper. FML

#11857753
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19834) - you deserved it (45094)

On 07/13/2010 at 7:15pm - misc - by Criminal (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I walked four blocks with toilet paper hanging out of my pants. FML

#11548771
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19297) - you deserved it (26112)

On 06/29/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by Tp (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that dirty talk does NOT get me off. My boyfriend and I were having sex and I said "I'm going to come" during the beginning of my orgasm. My orgasm immediately stopped right after I said that. I turned myself off. FML

#11271577
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32880) - you deserved it (14751)

On 06/17/2010 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: