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nothing92x

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nothing92x

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  • Number of visits : 4736
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to find that my cat had knocked over a $35 can of powdered baby formula, and there were TWO different colonies of ants warring over the bounty all over the counter. FML

#13930186
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20421) - you deserved it (3685)

On 11/21/2010 at 9:51pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I shadowed an ultrasound technician for my future career. She did an ultrasound on me to show me how to do the job. I found out I was pregnant. FML

#13863853
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47788) - you deserved it (11840)

On 11/16/2010 at 10:34am - misc - by nicolette5785452 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I changed my phone number because my old one belonged to a prostitute. My new one belongs to a debtor. FML

#13835312
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24785) - you deserved it (2555)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found that my "lesbian" best friend and roommate is now dating the guy I've been trying to get a date with for weeks. FML

#13829911
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27485) - you deserved it (2858)

On 11/13/2010 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, b*tch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML

#13827261
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11791) - you deserved it (49894)

On 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I tripped on a step that said "Watch your step." Two hours later, I hit my head on a sign that said "Mind your head." FML

#13823119
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27678) - you deserved it (13123)

On 11/13/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my six year old daughter discovered the family's pet rabbit in the basement freezer. The rabbit had died almost a year ago, and we'd stored it in the freezer, intending to bury it later. Here's to the trauma of losing the family pet. Twice. FML

#13815438
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7174) - you deserved it (40019)

On 11/12/2010 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was taking medicine for my sinus problems and trying to write an essay. I got most of the way done, then unexpectedly fell asleep on my keyboard. When I woke up, my face was wet. I drowned my laptop in my drool. FML

#13777166
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20108) - you deserved it (5714)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:17pm - work - by drooooooool (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend of two years dumped me, because I'd changed too much for her to bear, and I was breaking her heart. How did I change? I got braces. FML

#13713440
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32491) - you deserved it (2898)

On 11/04/2010 at 11:04am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a maths test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML

#13673921
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32703) - you deserved it (3833)

On 11/01/2010 at 11:10am - intimacy - by crazy_mom (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a maths test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML

#13673921
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32703) - you deserved it (3833)

On 11/01/2010 at 11:10am - intimacy - by crazy_mom (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, it was my first day as a mailman. One of the houses got a bunch of cards, and the owner coincidentally opened the door as I arrived. So I said to the owner that someone in the house must really be popular. He replied, "She died this Tuesday." FML

#13587554
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30113) - you deserved it (6007)

On 10/25/2010 at 7:03am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, while I was substitute teaching a middle school class, a boy, named Chris, refused to get in the boy's line for the bathroom. After I had said, "Chris, what makes you think you're a girl?" in a very loud voice, one of the other students said "She is a girl." I've scarred a child for life. FML

#13571431
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11974) - you deserved it (45934)

On 10/24/2010 at 1:26am - kids - by badteacher (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found a surveillance camera in my room. FML

#13490049
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46694) - you deserved it (3625)

On 10/17/2010 at 8:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my sister and I were both on Facebook, updating our statuses. I set mine to "just got released from hospital with Baby Lily", as I'd had a baby earlier this week. My sister set hers to "menstrual blood smells like shrimp". Her status got 37 likes. Mine got none. FML

#13469972
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32949) - you deserved it (6428)

On 10/16/2010 at 8:31am - love - by married (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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