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nothing92x

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nothing92x

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  • Number of visits : 3364
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, I found that my "lesbian" best friend and roommate is now dating the guy I've been trying to get a date with for weeks. FML

#13829911
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27329) - you deserved it (2852)

On 11/13/2010 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, b*tch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML

#13827261
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11733) - you deserved it (49705)

On 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I tripped on a step that said "Watch your step." Two hours later, I hit my head on a sign that said "Mind your head." FML

#13823119
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26981) - you deserved it (12878)

On 11/13/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my six year old daughter discovered the family's pet rabbit in the basement freezer. The rabbit had died almost a year ago, and we'd stored it in the freezer, intending to bury it later. Here's to the trauma of losing the family pet. Twice. FML

#13815438
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6776) - you deserved it (38758)

On 11/12/2010 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was taking medicine for my sinus problems and trying to write an essay. I got most of the way done, then unexpectedly fell asleep on my keyboard. When I woke up, my face was wet. I drowned my laptop in my drool. FML

#13777166
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19951) - you deserved it (5699)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:17pm - work - by drooooooool (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend of two years dumped me, because I'd changed too much for her to bear, and I was breaking her heart. How did I change? I got braces. FML

#13713440
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32012) - you deserved it (2863)

On 11/04/2010 at 11:04am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a maths test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML

#13673921
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32503) - you deserved it (3824)

On 11/01/2010 at 11:10am - intimacy - by crazy_mom (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a maths test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML

#13673921
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32503) - you deserved it (3824)

On 11/01/2010 at 11:10am - intimacy - by crazy_mom (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, it was my first day as a mailman. One of the houses got a bunch of cards, and the owner coincidentally opened the door as I arrived. So I said to the owner that someone in the house must really be popular. He replied, "She died this Tuesday." FML

#13587554
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29182) - you deserved it (5906)

On 10/25/2010 at 7:03am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, while I was substitute teaching a middle school class, a boy, named Chris, refused to get in the boy's line for the bathroom. After I had said, "Chris, what makes you think you're a girl?" in a very loud voice, one of the other students said "She is a girl." I've scarred a child for life. FML

#13571431
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11888) - you deserved it (45799)

On 10/24/2010 at 1:26am - kids - by badteacher (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found a surveillance camera in my room. FML

#13490049
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46480) - you deserved it (3621)

On 10/17/2010 at 8:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my sister and I were both on Facebook, updating our statuses. I set mine to "just got released from hospital with Baby Lily", as I'd had a baby earlier this week. My sister set hers to "menstrual blood smells like shrimp". Her status got 37 likes. Mine got none. FML

#13469972
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32563) - you deserved it (6391)

On 10/16/2010 at 8:31am - love - by married (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend told me "don't worry, someday you'll be mature as well." By this, he meant that I will be willing to have sex with him in public. FML

#13454741
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26931) - you deserved it (4144)

On 10/15/2010 at 1:13am - intimacy - by anouk05 (woman) - Switzerland (Vaud)

Today, as I put my 4 year old daughter in the car seat, she dropped her crayon. She then paused and matter-of-factly said, "Mommy, I don't say 'f***' anymore when I drop things." FML

#13450247
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21457) - you deserved it (8258)

On 10/14/2010 at 8:25pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I passed a car, and heard a baby crying in the back seat. It was hot and no one was around. All the doors were locked so I broke it with a rock, cutting my arm and setting the alarm off. Only to find out that it was a realistic baby doll. I have to get 7 stitches and pay for the window. FML

#13382231
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27178) - you deserved it (8010)

On 10/09/2010 at 7:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - Antigua and Barbuda (Saint John)



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