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nothing92x

Offline (the 10/27/2014 at 5:02am) | Search for a member

nothing92x

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  • Number of visits : 4146
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend chose the most expensive restaurant in town, then spent the entire time facebooking, texting, and playing games on her phone while I dined in silence. This is the second time we've been out this week. She didn't even eat her food. I didn't even get a thank you. FML

#15749672
418 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53401) - you deserved it (13556)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:27am - love - by BrokeAndPsst (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I broke up with my now ex-girlfriend for the 5th time. She still hasn't got the hint. FML

#15749336
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33587) - you deserved it (11223)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:08am - love - by husks -

Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML

#15749213
780 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66781) - you deserved it (14051)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:00am - intimacy - by Artic (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML

#15748072
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29200) - you deserved it (2936)

On 04/11/2011 at 11:07pm - health - by ILiveWithMorons (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth pulled. My usually detached and unromantic boyfriend rushed right over after work with flowers and movies. A little while later, he admitted excitedly that he'd heard the numbing medication also works on gag reflexes and wanted to test the theory. FML

#15741479
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44272) - you deserved it (6377)

On 04/11/2011 at 3:27pm - intimacy - by Numb (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that my boyfriend does not stop by my apartment to give me a kiss between classes. He is actually stopping by between his classes to steal my condoms because he is too cheap to pay for them when he cheats on me. FML

#15740141
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61170) - you deserved it (5107)

On 04/11/2011 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Carmen - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML

#15738282
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20576) - you deserved it (67822)

On 04/11/2011 at 9:16am - intimacy - by CheeseyPotatoes (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blow job from me. FML

#15733743
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39153) - you deserved it (8604)

On 04/11/2011 at 12:01am - intimacy - by blower - United States (Colorado)

Today, we had a tornado warning and I told my parents I loved them, just in case. My dad just said "see you in Kansas". FML

#15733028
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24890) - you deserved it (7506)

On 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm - misc - by anonymous -

Today, I found out my cat is allergic to ME. No kidding. FML

#15703815
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32343) - you deserved it (3906)

On 04/09/2011 at 1:32am - animals - by blehhx - United States

Today, I was in the emergency room. The doctor told me that my injuries and back problems are the intensity of those after a car accident. I slipped on a grape. FML

#15691583
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35294) - you deserved it (4940)

On 04/08/2011 at 6:35am - health - by ridella -

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

#15678976
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34409) - you deserved it (13150)

On 04/07/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I wore my cheerleading uniform to my boyfriend's house. He was a nerd in high school and mentioned a fantasy about hooking up with a cheerleader. I started acting sassy and a little mean, figuring he would enjoy a more realistic experience. Apparently not, because he started to cry. FML

#15658091
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25651) - you deserved it (45716)

On 04/05/2011 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by oc_cheergirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I attended a funeral. During the minute of silence, my phone went off. My ringtone is "It's good to be alive". FML

#15616538
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19319) - you deserved it (53238)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:02am - misc - by JJMan217 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that my girlfriend can only orgasm when we have sex to gospel music. FML

#15613942
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49433) - you deserved it (5853)

On 04/03/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by cantgetup (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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