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nothing92x's favorite FMLs
by Gavin / 02/20/2012 at 4:19pm / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Intimacy
by Anonymoosey / 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm / Canada / Intimacy
by jodibut / 02/06/2012 at 11:18am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML
by ABBenzin / 02/01/2012 at 11:11am / United States / Work
Today, I had to sit my 13-year-old son down and explain to him that I'd noticed that his pajamas feel a little "crispy" when I pick them up to do the laundry, and ask if he could start using tissues when having some "alone time." FML
by stainseverywhere / 02/01/2012 at 2:11am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by idrathernotgiveoutmyname / 01/30/2012 at 9:50pm / Canada / Intimacy
by StupidNurse / 01/26/2012 at 4:57pm / Germany / Work
by Dutchee / 01/23/2012 at 6:27am / Netherlands (Friesland) / Health
by Anonymous / 01/21/2012 at 5:38pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by sharky / 01/20/2012 at 4:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, in preparation for proposing to my girlfriend, I borrowed one of her rings, so I could discreetly get her ring size. Not only have I now lost the ring, which turns out to be a keepsake of her dead grandmother, I still don't know her ring size. FML
by machismo / 01/13/2012 at 1:16pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by annoying / 01/09/2012 at 8:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Cpt Colin / 01/03/2012 at 2:17am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML
by Anonymous / 01/01/2012 at 2:34am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
by KrissyBearr / 12/30/2011 at 8:36pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
- Today, my phone provider informed me that I had 12 messages waiting for me on my voicemail. Happy… Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the… Today, I’m a babysitter for a 4 year-old little girl. All afternoon, I attended Barbie’s murder and…