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Today, my husband and I were diagnosed with herpes. We've been together for five years and were both virgins before. Even the doctor couldn't give any other explanation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42358) - you deserved it (5639)
On 04/17/2011 at 10:29am - health - by bumpyroad - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, after receiving the third call this week from teachers about my son falling asleep in class, I decided that it would be a good idea to hide his Xbox controllers. He decided it would be a good idea to hide my diabetes medication. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38057) - you deserved it (13503)
On 04/16/2011 at 8:35am - health - by bbedlock (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. This is the moment he chooses to exclaim, "Wow, you really do have a lot of dandruff!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (34365) - you deserved it (8680) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/16/2011 at 7:28am - intimacy - by Proprepourtant - France
Today, my wife and I were planning our nursery for our future child. She said that we'd be painting it pink either way. I asked what would happen if we had a boy. She said "Oh, he'll be gay" with a menacing glare. I'm worried. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32615) - you deserved it (4966)
On 04/16/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Worried (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I made a video for a school tour of my apartment in German. The walls in my apartment are thin, so you could hear my sister having phone sex in her room in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27947) - you deserved it (4042)
On 04/16/2011 at 3:04am - intimacy - by Xanadu (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, the only person to tell me "Happy birthday" was the cop who pulled me over, as he handed me my ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28837) - you deserved it (3344)
On 04/16/2011 at 2:11am - misc - by uncool (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9243) - you deserved it (68723)
On 04/16/2011 at 1:14am - misc - by Username - United States (California)
Today, my husband of 30 years told me that he thought we should 'just be friends'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52001) - you deserved it (3304)
On 04/15/2011 at 7:38am - love - by ZaraAce (woman) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24584) - you deserved it (5739)
On 04/15/2011 at 1:47am - misc - by HWS - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I accidentally pocket dialed my sister while I was masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17249) - you deserved it (40347)
On 04/15/2011 at 1:34am - intimacy - by fmyhabit - United States (Utah)
Today, to impress my friends, I attempted to do a back flip. The only one impressed was the doctor who set my broken leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7127) - you deserved it (25195)
On 04/14/2011 at 6:27pm - health - by fail (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I confronted my husband about him being unfaithful. He said his reasons were because he's just not attracted to me anymore and my current weight repulses him. I'm six months pregnant with his child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49719) - you deserved it (3134)
On 04/14/2011 at 2:28pm - love - by Pregnant (woman) - United States (Florida)
I agree, your life sucks (23401) - you deserved it (5650)
On 04/14/2011 at 1:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (37831) - you deserved it (5076)
On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -
Today, I freaked out when the remote wouldn't unlock my car. I stood in the rain trying to open the door. Unsure of what to do next, I called my boyfriend. He told me to "put the key in the door". I had forgotten about that option. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6754) - you deserved it (46703)
On 04/13/2011 at 5:44pm - misc - by andimanastudent (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Monday 20 May 2013
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