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nothing92x

Offline (the 11/16/2014 at 8:15pm) | Search for a member

nothing92x

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  • Number of visits : 4353
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend came before I'd even unbuttoned my pants. FML

#16877997
349 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55074) - you deserved it (7109)

On 06/27/2011 at 4:56am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, after ordering pizza, I heard some strange noises coming from my basement so I called the cops. The pizza came fifteen minutes before the cops. FML

#16848104
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31258) - you deserved it (4843)

On 06/25/2011 at 10:21am - misc - by woahheylex - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was supposed to go on a date. I have been playing solitaire the whole night waiting for him. Out of 15 games, I've won one. FML

#16842915
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29161) - you deserved it (4529)

On 06/25/2011 at 12:30am - love - by yourmomsabitch (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend "Actually, its a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML

#16640973
369 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56872) - you deserved it (4109)

On 06/13/2011 at 5:11am - misc - by Bechara (man) - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, my girlfriend went on a date with her mechanic. She said it was to get discounts when she goes in for maintenance. Not only does she not see a problem with it, but she's probably getting discounts on other services too. FML

#16499106
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33207) - you deserved it (4789)

On 06/04/2011 at 1:37pm - love - by hcflorence1 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend's band has become quite popular on YouTube. My friends and sister won't stop singing their songs. Most of them were written after I dumped him, and go on to say how much better off he is without me and how horrible I am. FML

#16495662
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30176) - you deserved it (21247)

On 06/04/2011 at 7:35am - love - by guttedgirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

#16448858
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16446) - you deserved it (27810)

On 06/01/2011 at 8:35am - intimacy - by Username - Canada

Today, I was stood up by a blind date. After calling and texting her about being a horrible person, she called me from the hospital. She was in a car accident. FML

#16439169
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11234) - you deserved it (54918)

On 05/31/2011 at 6:35pm - love - by bfall74 - Canada

Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It was the Pokémon theme song. FML

#16435078
488 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15776) - you deserved it (74616)

On 05/31/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by chickennbenchpress (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he pees on the toilet seat just to piss me off. FML

#16414850
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38853) - you deserved it (8365)

On 05/30/2011 at 8:18am - misc - by Miramichi - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I let my son drive us home. After just 10 feet, he crashed into a parked cop car. It was my squad car. FML

#16398150
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30128) - you deserved it (14130)

On 05/29/2011 at 4:12am - kids - by adogg18 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to sneak out. As I was climbing out of my 3rd floor window, he got a text and moved the ladder. Now I'm in the hospital with two broken ribs. FML

#16382650
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21102) - you deserved it (32765)

On 05/28/2011 at 2:45am - love - by epicfail (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

#16339516
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51857) - you deserved it (17597)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:23am - intimacy - by katie -

Today, I asked my husband, of only a year, why we don't have sex anymore. He said it's because he masturbates. When I asked how often he did it, he replied "Every day that we don't have sex..." FML

#16277359
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32396) - you deserved it (8925)

On 05/21/2011 at 3:18am - intimacy - by btswc - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML

#16251176
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9796) - you deserved it (72423)

On 05/19/2011 at 11:13am - work - by Username -



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