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nothing92x

Offline (the 10/27/2014 at 5:02am) | Search for a member

nothing92x

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  • Number of visits : 4164
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend went on a date with her mechanic. She said it was to get discounts when she goes in for maintenance. Not only does she not see a problem with it, but she's probably getting discounts on other services too. FML

#16499106
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33205) - you deserved it (4787)

On 06/04/2011 at 1:37pm - love - by hcflorence1 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend's band has become quite popular on YouTube. My friends and sister won't stop singing their songs. Most of them were written after I dumped him, and go on to say how much better off he is without me and how horrible I am. FML

#16495662
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30149) - you deserved it (21236)

On 06/04/2011 at 7:35am - love - by guttedgirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

#16448858
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16428) - you deserved it (27797)

On 06/01/2011 at 8:35am - intimacy - by Username - Canada

Today, I was stood up by a blind date. After calling and texting her about being a horrible person, she called me from the hospital. She was in a car accident. FML

#16439169
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11226) - you deserved it (54891)

On 05/31/2011 at 6:35pm - love - by bfall74 - Canada

Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It was the Pokémon theme song. FML

#16435078
488 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15772) - you deserved it (74589)

On 05/31/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by chickennbenchpress (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he pees on the toilet seat just to piss me off. FML

#16414850
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38832) - you deserved it (8358)

On 05/30/2011 at 8:18am - misc - by Miramichi - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I let my son drive us home. After just 10 feet, he crashed into a parked cop car. It was my squad car. FML

#16398150
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30108) - you deserved it (14128)

On 05/29/2011 at 4:12am - kids - by adogg18 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to sneak out. As I was climbing out of my 3rd floor window, he got a text and moved the ladder. Now I'm in the hospital with two broken ribs. FML

#16382650
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21088) - you deserved it (32756)

On 05/28/2011 at 2:45am - love - by epicfail (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

#16339516
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51833) - you deserved it (17588)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:23am - intimacy - by katie -

Today, I asked my husband, of only a year, why we don't have sex anymore. He said it's because he masturbates. When I asked how often he did it, he replied "Every day that we don't have sex..." FML

#16277359
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32376) - you deserved it (8920)

On 05/21/2011 at 3:18am - intimacy - by btswc - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML

#16251176
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9794) - you deserved it (72378)

On 05/19/2011 at 11:13am - work - by Username -

Today, while making love to my wife, I let slip her sister's name. I don't think it would calm her down much if I told the truth: I was actually thinking of an ex girlfriend who shares the same name. FML

#16157723
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11209) - you deserved it (61259)

On 05/13/2011 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by scalmon - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
249 comments

Today, I woke up late for a job interview. I hadn't shaved in six days, but figuring I could do so en route, I grabbed my electric razor and ran for the bus. While shaving, the razor's battery died midway through, leaving me to attend the job interview with a Miami Vice scruff on half my face. FML

#16117533
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13993) - you deserved it (33466)

On 05/10/2011 at 1:24pm - work - by scruffy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I walked out of my house, waved at my neighbors, walked through my front yard and into the side yard to turn off the sprinkler. It wasn't until I was back into the house that I remembered I wasn't wearing a top. FML

#16066360
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15686) - you deserved it (48189)

On 05/06/2011 at 10:07am - intimacy - by eringoBRA (woman) - United States (Texas)



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