Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nothing92x

Offline (the 05/25/2015 at 5:42am) | Search for a member

nothing92x

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6359
  • Number of comments : 61
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nothing92x's page activity

Visits<b>MalcolmRodrigues</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 4:13am<b>reburkah</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 7:36pm<b>drunk_crow</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 6:12pm<b>groovy579</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:45pm<b>etnoc</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:04pm<b>WaltzingPhantom</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 1:27am<b>kittyfrozen</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 7:27pm<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 1:19am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:02am<b>james98e</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 1:44am<b>sophzxc</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 12:25am<b>LPRZ17</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 9:39pm<b>KJxFTW</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 1:30am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:45pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:45am<b>MacItUp</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 3:55pm<b>deathposts</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 2:58am<b>CamBen</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 1:04am

nothing92x's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of nothing92x's badges

nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my doctor. I casually asked him why I keep getting headaches after I masturbate. He said it probably was a sign from God. FML

#18314611
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35057) - you deserved it (11676)

On 11/22/2011 at 4:36am - intimacy - by toomuch (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML

#18305013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32604) - you deserved it (3611)

On 11/21/2011 at 2:22am - love - by nightowl506 - United States (Texas)

Today, my buddy told me he was going to get an HIV test at the health department. Without thinking, I told him to "think positive". FML

#18216431
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29314) - you deserved it (7563)

On 11/11/2011 at 3:42am - health - by devinchi (man) - United States

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

#18191670
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39190) - you deserved it (3870)

On 11/08/2011 at 9:01am - kids - by possiblyoverweight (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on the toilet, and then had to give my boss a valid reason for why I was late. FML

#18181534
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22773) - you deserved it (4783)

On 11/07/2011 at 1:49am - work - by Courtney - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating on me. His response? "It's not like I liked it." FML

#18180639
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36625) - you deserved it (3426)

On 11/06/2011 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by Cat - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I scored the winning goal in my soccer tournament. For the other team. FML

Today, my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, and making me walk the 4 miles home in the freezing rain. FML

#18145406
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41425) - you deserved it (3061)

On 11/03/2011 at 5:18am - misc - by Grounded (woman) - United States

Today, my parents staged a family intervention and gave me the grandest bollocking I've ever experienced in all my 22 years of life. They did this because my sister showed them a photo of me jokingly posing with three bottles of Bud Light at a party. Apparently, I'm an alcoholic in denial. FML

#18065493
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24409) - you deserved it (4406)

On 10/24/2011 at 6:46pm - misc - by wtf (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML

#17982026
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37829) - you deserved it (2934)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved

Today, I decided to make home made french fries. I figured all I needed was potatoes and salt, right? Wrong! I also needed the fire department and an ambulance. FML

#17934685
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17537) - you deserved it (25405)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:36am - misc - by anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

#17919622
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39069) - you deserved it (10047)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I had a job interview. The only moment I impressed the interviewer was when I talked about drama. He started to talk about a play I hadn't seen, but I decided to agree on everything he was saying. Suddenly he said, "the play doesn't actually exist." I silently left the room. FML

#17912138
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8431) - you deserved it (33407)

On 10/05/2011 at 4:33pm - work - by Lyingg (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

#17852902
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27868) - you deserved it (8161)

On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my sister told me that she read that the pain of giving birth is equal to the pain of breaking 20 bones at once. I'm 19 weeks pregnant. FML

#17755798
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25461) - you deserved it (5355)

On 09/16/2011 at 1:21am - health - by ouch - United States



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: