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nothing92x

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nothing92x
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 2560
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

#16339516
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49529) - you deserved it (16933)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:23am - intimacy - by katie -

Today, I asked my husband, of only a year, why we don't have sex anymore. He said it's because he masturbates. When I asked how often he did it, he replied "Every day that we don't have sex..." FML

#16277359
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30962) - you deserved it (8723)

On 05/21/2011 at 3:18am - intimacy - by btswc - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML

#16251176
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8313) - you deserved it (65807)

On 05/19/2011 at 11:13am - work - by Username -

Today, while making love to my wife, I let slip her sister's name. I don't think it would calm her down much if I told the truth: I was actually thinking of an ex girlfriend who shares the same name. FML

#16157723
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9266) - you deserved it (46752)

On 05/13/2011 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by scalmon - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
249 comments

Today, I woke up late for a job interview. I hadn't shaved in six days, but figuring I could do so en route, I grabbed my electric razor and ran for the bus. While shaving, the razor's battery died midway through, leaving me to attend the job interview with a Miami Vice scruff on half my face. FML

#16117533
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12968) - you deserved it (31604)

On 05/10/2011 at 1:24pm - work - by scruffy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I walked out of my house, waved at my neighbors, walked through my front yard and into the side yard to turn off the sprinkler. It wasn't until I was back into the house that I remembered I wasn't wearing a top. FML

#16066360
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12824) - you deserved it (36739)

On 05/06/2011 at 10:07am - intimacy - by eringoBRA (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked out of my house, waved at my neighbors, walked through my front yard and into the side yard to turn off the sprinkler. It wasn't until I was back into the house that I remembered I wasn't wearing a top. FML

#16066360
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12824) - you deserved it (36739)

On 05/06/2011 at 10:07am - intimacy - by eringoBRA (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was told that I am an incredibly boring person and that it's no wonder I have no friends. I think they're right; last night I dreamt about a nail file. FML

#16064729
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26819) - you deserved it (6331)

On 05/06/2011 at 3:25am - misc - by goinginsane -

Today, I passed out when my blood sugar dropped. Three times. And each time, my roommate, who was right next to me, just let me fall because he liked the way my face looked. FML

#16063448
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30954) - you deserved it (3934)

On 05/06/2011 at 12:27am - health - by Koda -

Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML

#16057937
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56737) - you deserved it (4509)

On 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Monika (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was trying to convince a friend that even though I'm blonde, I'm not the oblivious or stupid moron everyone apparently thinks I am. Then I smacked face-first into a glass door. FML

#16057186
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23275) - you deserved it (26617)

On 05/05/2011 at 4:01pm - misc - by Blondie (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, after spending 8 months and $11,000 on school, I was denied a job in my chosen career field. They told me they decided to go with someone with more experience. So who got the job? One of my classmates. This is her first job. EVER. FML

#16053406
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27382) - you deserved it (2464)

On 05/05/2011 at 2:54am - misc - by alphafoxy21 - United States (Alaska)

Today, my mother told me she forgot what a verb is. I'm homeschooled, and she's my teacher. FML

#16052979
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35866) - you deserved it (4458)

On 05/05/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by asadwa -

Today, at work, I was supposed to have an easy two-hour shift, after which I was planning on attending a party that had been arranged to celebrate my graduation. Nearly six hours later, I am just getting home after being super busy and shorthanded at work for hours. I missed my own party. FML

#16052456
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23859) - you deserved it (2222)

On 05/05/2011 at 12:44am - work - by cstokes (woman) - United States



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