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nothing92x

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nothing92x

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  • Number of visits : 4707
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Visits<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:02am<b>james98e</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 1:44am<b>sophzxc</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 12:25am<b>LPRZ17</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 9:39pm<b>KJxFTW</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 1:30am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:45pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:45am<b>MacItUp</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 3:55pm<b>deathposts</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 2:58am<b>CamBen</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 1:04am<b>Ruler3000</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 10:51pm<b>IrishGirl12</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 9:22am<b>ghiman</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 6:58am<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 11:59pm<b>Clumsyblonde22</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 9:32pm<b>Anner22</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 7:31pm<b>jedidesauden</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 1:20pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 4:51pm

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to go buy myself a dildo to use on my lonely nights. Once at the adult store, I also grabbed a birthday card to make it seem the dildo wasn't for me. At the register, the cashier looked at me and said, "For God's sake, save yourself some money. I already know it's for you." FML

#20742274
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58681) - you deserved it (22894)

On 06/23/2013 at 6:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

#20695159
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63162) - you deserved it (5071)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that me having a boyfriend is an on-going family joke. FML

#20694663
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42779) - you deserved it (3775)

On 05/30/2013 at 1:37am - love - by I'm a joke? -

Today, a girl at my tanning salon was ranting about how expensive it was and how she wished there was a cheaper way to get a tan. I joked, "Like from the sun?" She angrily called me a "sassy bitch", screamed to my boss about me, and then threatened to sue us when he kicked her out. FML

#20689621
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45997) - you deserved it (4033)

On 05/27/2013 at 4:18pm - work - by fuck you retail (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend decided to wake me up from a nap by kissing me. I started kissing her back passionately, when she slapped me. Apparently, kissing her back automatically without "confirming her identity" counts as cheating. FML

#20688020
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59807) - you deserved it (4056)

On 05/26/2013 at 8:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my step-dad was talking about how he was raised in Las Vegas, telling stories about him and his buddies, until he stopped, looked right at my mom and said, "Find her, feed her, f*ck her, forget her. But I never forgot your mom, that's how I stole her from your dad." FML

#20687932
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53903) - you deserved it (3715)

On 05/26/2013 at 7:20pm - intimacy - by MsAnonymous17 (woman) - United States

Today, I borrowed my boyfriend's laptop. Out of curiosity, I clicked through the bookmarks in his web browser. One of them took me to a site dedicated to sex stories featuring characters from My Little Pony. FML

#20687700
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43207) - you deserved it (16973)

On 05/26/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by bestiality? do I look like a pig? (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out where the mysterious bites on my back keep coming from. It's not every day you find an earwig in your loofah. FML

#20687417
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36941) - you deserved it (3893)

On 05/26/2013 at 1:55pm - health - by ewwww (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

#20673456
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46637) - you deserved it (3578)

On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML

#20673142
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49991) - you deserved it (7007)

On 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I reconnected with my best friend from childhood, and after a tearful confession, found out that for most of my engagement to my husband, she was repeatedly connecting with his penis. FML

#20672990
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42302) - you deserved it (2821)

On 05/19/2013 at 1:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, the couch I bought a week ago was delivered. I don't know which is worse: my son being the one to point out it's been "used", or that he used a black light to prove it. FML

#20672414
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49294) - you deserved it (4506)

On 05/19/2013 at 3:35am - kids - by disappointed dad - United States

Today, while at hospital with a broken arm, I was asked to raise my hand onto the x-ray machine. I told the nurse I couldn't move it without extreme pain. She told me to suck it up, picked up my arm, and dropped it on the machine. I could feel the bone completely separate. FML

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because she apparently saw me making out with her sister. She doesn't even have a sister. FML

#20671163
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49721) - you deserved it (4233)

On 05/18/2013 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got my third promotion at work in as many years. My husband congratulated me very briefly, before asking if this meant he no longer had to look for a job. FML

#20671146
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38305) - you deserved it (4655)

On 05/18/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Mexico (Guanajuato)



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