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nothing92x

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nothing92x

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  • Number of visits : 4660
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, I followed my wife out, since she's been acting strangely lately and I was suspicious. She met up with a guy at a restaurant, who she later claimed was her brother. Either she's cheating on me, or it's tradition in her family to make out and grope each other at the end of meals. FML

#21087493
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56992) - you deserved it (4385)

On 03/15/2014 at 5:48pm - love - by broken vows (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mum asked me how the guinea pig was doing. We don't have a guinea pig. Turns out she had volunteered me to look after the next door neighbor's guinea pig when they were away and 'forgot' to tell me. They have been gone two weeks. FML

#21071021
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48320) - you deserved it (3427)

On 02/25/2014 at 4:59am - animals - by HelpMe (man) - United Kingdom (Scottish Borders, The)

Today, my mom told me all about how I was conceived in a Disney Land toilet. FML

#21070288
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41532) - you deserved it (3649)

On 02/24/2014 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Dudley)

Today, a guy from work that I barely know gave me sunflowers for my birthday. He told me, "You mentioned they were your favorite." I mentioned it to my family at home a few days ago. FML

#21069947
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46048) - you deserved it (4124)

On 02/23/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by You Are My Sunshine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was shopping, when a man pointed at me and said to his friend, "Her. She's the one." He replied, "Yes, she'll do fine." I'm scared. FML

Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML

#21068134
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50717) - you deserved it (9291)

On 02/22/2014 at 12:39am - intimacy - by awkward (man) - United States

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, I tried to lose my virginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. FML

#21020996
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59594) - you deserved it (25843)

On 01/08/2014 at 12:43am - intimacy - by gottacatchemall (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend sent me a link to a Vine video in which she dumped me. FML

#21020871
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50411) - you deserved it (3989)

On 01/07/2014 at 11:21pm - love - by Jae_Hellyun (man) - United States

Today, despite all of the pictures and proof of my fiancé, my parents still think I have an imaginary boyfriend. They met him, and were there when he proposed. They think it's all a joke. FML

#21017461
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53593) - you deserved it (4028)

On 01/05/2014 at 2:11am - love - by Fiancé problemsss - United States (Montana)

Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I looked over at my friend and said, "Number 33 has a really cute butt." The man in front of us turned around, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "Thanks." Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML

#21017330
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46771) - you deserved it (12667)

On 01/05/2014 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a restaurant for her birthday. She had to go to the toilet while there, and when she came back, she was crying. When I asked why, she said "I'm on my period!" and sobbed loudly in front of everyone that we couldn't have birthday sex. FML

#21016986
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58562) - you deserved it (6233)

On 01/04/2014 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I received a pair of earrings, a necklace, and some rings as a Christmas gift from my grandma. This would have been nice if I weren't a guy. This is her way of mocking me for wearing what she calls "girl colors", such as white. FML

#21004875
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37945) - you deserved it (2994)

On 12/25/2013 at 12:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out I was passed over for the promotion I've wanted for 9 months at the fast food restaurant I work in. Who got the job? The 16 year old girl I trained 2 weeks ago. Their excuse was, "She has ambition." I'm going to college for food service management. She failed her drug test. FML

#21001701
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50398) - you deserved it (3817)

On 12/22/2013 at 7:58pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

#21001267
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50186) - you deserved it (6944)

On 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by bleach bleach bleach (woman) - United States (Nevada)



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