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nothing92x

Offline (the 08/24/2015 at 8:16am) | Search for a member

nothing92x

2Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 7145
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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nothing92x's page activity

Visits<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 2:42pm<b>FalloutScrolls</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 2:41pm<b>mutiplyyou</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 1:44pm<b>s3kShUn47</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 11:21pm<b>KayleyBaby37</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 8:17pm<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 7:55pm<b>BigL99</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:41pm<b>bab3ruthl3ss</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:36pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:39am<b>Ajwc95</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:36am<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:28am<b>Lacalema</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:38am<b>styles829</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:57pm<b>gracehi</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:47pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:38pm<b>MalcolmRodrigues</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 4:13am<b>reburkah</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 7:36pm<b>drunk_crow</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 6:12pm

Fucked!<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 7:28am<b>gracehi</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:47am

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that my Twitter profile was very public when my business professor made fun of student tweets in class. My tweet went, "Totally bullshitting this business report" about the report I had just handed in, worth a large portion of my grade. FML

#20584642
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14305) - you deserved it (82706)

On 04/11/2013 at 3:49am - work - by imscrewed - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I offered to pay my boyfriend to buy me flowers. He still refused. FML

#20584487
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42064) - you deserved it (15612)

On 04/11/2013 at 12:53am - love - by flowerging (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML

#20583902
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48284) - you deserved it (5534)

On 04/10/2013 at 6:17pm - love - by drama king? (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband and I announced our upcoming divorce. My friends told me how sorry they were and that they're available for whatever I need. His friends told him to just call the girl from last weekend and get himself laid again. FML

#20583666
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51551) - you deserved it (6763)

On 04/10/2013 at 3:09pm - love - by a - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is". Orgasm gone. FML

#20583515
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52729) - you deserved it (8414)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:32pm - intimacy - by iwassoclose - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

#20583013
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52846) - you deserved it (11939)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, our guest lecturer told us to imagine 25,000 dead koalas in our lecture theatre, and if that didn't make us emotional then we didn't care about them. She then went on a rant, during which she encouraged us to join the "koala army". FML

#20580464
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33003) - you deserved it (3216)

On 04/08/2013 at 10:08am - work - by save the koalas? uhh - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML

Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML

#20580049
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43098) - you deserved it (6427)

On 04/08/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by badparent (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

#20579781
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15910) - you deserved it (61157)

On 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by maturity - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was telling my aunt that I had achieved my blue belt in karate. Looking at my short hair, she says, "You're going to end up a lesbian." Thanks Aunt L. Love you too. FML

Today, a few months after my co-worker had stopped wearing her engagement ring, I decided to put on the moves and start flirting with her. I soon found out that her fiancé had died, and that she's nowhere near over him, despite her brave face. I feel like a total asshole. FML

#20558292
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47339) - you deserved it (24407)

On 03/24/2013 at 5:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while driving extremely fast on a road in the middle of nowhere, I started to go down a hill. Noticing a police car at the bottom, I slammed my brakes and blew a tire in the process. It turns out the police car was an old cutout used to trick people. FML

#20520975
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11406) - you deserved it (54248)

On 02/24/2013 at 10:41pm - misc - by Fox - United States

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

#20511941
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38272) - you deserved it (3373)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while on my way to the movies, I stopped at a gas station to pick up candy so I could avoid the high prices at the movies. The guy who tore my ticket asked for my purse, confiscated my candy, and then kicked me out of the movie theater. That guy was my boyfriend. FML

#20510592
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47821) - you deserved it (8341)

On 02/17/2013 at 10:50am - love - by Cheyennereed - United States (South Carolina)



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