nothing92x

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Offline (the 08/24/2015 at 8:16am)

nothing92x

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10196
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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nothing92x's page activity

Visits<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 3:12pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 2:42pm<b>FalloutScrolls</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 2:41pm<b>mutiplyyou</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 1:44pm<b>s3kShUn47</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 11:21pm<b>KayleyBaby37</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 8:17pm<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 7:55pm<b>BigL99</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:41pm<b>bab3ruthl3ss</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:36pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:39am<b>Ajwc95</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:36am<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:28am<b>Lacalema</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 12:38am<b>styles829</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:57pm<b>gracehi</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:47pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:38pm<b>MalcolmRodrigues</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 4:13am<b>reburkah</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 7:36pm

Fucked!<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 7:28am<b>gracehi</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 1:47am

nothing92x's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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nothing92x's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML

by prostitott / 05/04/2013 at 3:22am / Kids

Today, I overheard my boyfriend admitting that he's only dating me because having me around "sucks a bit less than fucking my own hand". FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2013 at 5:00pm / Germany / Love

Today, my mom accused me of being pregnant. She wouldn't believe me when I told her I'm a virgin, and she challenged me to take a pregnancy test. It came back with a false positive. FML

by DemiRawrs / 05/01/2013 at 1:23pm / United States / Health

Today, I was getting ready, when I heard my dad in the shower. He was singing along to the song "The Wheel in the Sky" by Journey. Except he'd changed the lyrics and was singing, "The dick on this guy needs a rubbin'." It turns out my mom was in the shower with him. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 12:13pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 11:55am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of two and a half years left me. To clear my head I decided to go for a drive. My car broke down on the way. The only mechanic I have ever used and trusted with my car is my boyfriend. Yes, I had to call him. FML

by brigie / 05/01/2013 at 4:21am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, I had to go buy diaper rash cream. For myself. FML

by ChangMu / 05/01/2013 at 2:40am / United States (Iowa) / Health

Today, I wanted revenge on my college's drinks machine. For the past two days, it forgot to release a cup before pouring my coffee. This time, I had planned ahead; I put my money in, entered the code, and quickly inserted my own cup. It gave me hot water. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2013 at 3:25am / France / Money

Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2013 at 9:57am / China (Shanghai) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, my 15-year-old brother got busted for selling pills at school. The officer said they were reddish pink, so we searched the house for that kind of pill. Turns out it was my dog's medicine from over 4 years ago. FML

by kkt / 04/25/2013 at 12:54am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my husband tried to annoy me by slurping on his almost-finished drink. I yelled at him to knock it off. Later, our daughter told her class that mommy and daddy had been fighting about his drinking during breakfast. FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 2:49pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML

by BIGCHEIFAAA / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was fired on my second day of work after a year and a half of unemployment. Apparently, my "tendency to solve problems instead of just accepting them made the other workers uneasy". FML

by anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / Germany / Work

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

by halliemarie1818 / 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm / United States / Animals