notachinesewoman

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notachinesewoman

7Fucked!

notachinesewomannotachinesewoman
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 April 1999 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5791
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About notachinesewoman : Hi. I don't bite, say hello and ask whatever you want to know :)
I'm currently studying to become a chef.
I'm the one with dark hair.
I love animals, reading, playing video games, going out, making people laugh, etc.. ☺️
I speak English, Spanish and French
If you read all the way here, thank you, have a nice day:)

notachinesewoman's page activity

Visits<b>SpartyOnWayne</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 12:10pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 10:57am<b>vreid</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 11:22am<b>JZAMORA777</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 8:45am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:54pm<b>hunter1019</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 10:11pm<b>emi_alejandra</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 8:42pm<b>PercyD1456</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 8:00pm<b>xcarlito615x</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 11:35pm<b>nicksmith228</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 2:31pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 11:43am<b>wafflelover</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 8:08pm<b>dbyrne20</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 7:42pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 3:35pm<b>jqmalang</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 5:05pm<b>cuervobombz</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 7:14am<b>badmandilon</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 8:26pm<b>brainymes</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:32pm

Fucked!<b>SpartyOnWayne</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 6:10pm<b>wafflelover</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 2:08am<b>shadow_heart_13</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 3:56pm<b>tiptoe55</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 4:42am<b>FattMatt01</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 2:57am<b>Hime9908</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 1:20am

notachinesewoman's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of notachinesewoman's badges

notachinesewoman's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a first date with my crush. Turns out we only have one thing in common: we would both bang Hillary Clinton. FML

by Anon / 04/28/2016 at 4:27pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML

by Dramaqueenfornothing / 04/27/2016 at 6:32pm / South Africa (Western Cape) / Love

Today, I discovered my cat is bathroom shy when I accidentally walked in on him relieving himself. He jumped about 3 feet in the air and bolted out, launching feces and pee all over the bathroom, hallway, and my shoes. FML

by poop / 03/24/2016 at 2:15pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I had to sit and smile as a drunk lady ranted about how body hair on a woman is disgusting and unfeminine, then in the next breath say that only pedos like women who shave their vaginas. That's the last time I ever have dinner with my boyfriend's parents. FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2015 at 11:51am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought my cat a fun toy at the one of a kind craft show. It has catnip in it, which he loves. He flipped out, so I took it away. He won't stop trying to break into the cupboard I put it in. My cat has a drug problem. FML

by allykat / 12/02/2014 at 7:56pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my neighbor's five-year-old rode his tricycle into a history diorama I had spent days slaving over. When I confronted him, he just said, "Vroom vroom muthafucka." FML

by hellalegit / 11/07/2014 at 1:26am / United States (California) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

by John / 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

by SaintGoobers / 10/06/2014 at 4:24pm / United States (New York) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked out the girl I really like. She turned me down, saying that she's a lesbian. That'd be fine, if I were a guy. FML

by apparentlybutch / 09/05/2014 at 5:11pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, my roommate came back from camping. My toothbrush magically reappeared as well. FML

by germophobe / 09/01/2014 at 9:53pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, after years of wonderful flying experiences, I boarded a flight and took my seat only to find a baby sitting in front of me, behind me, and to the right of me, and across the aisle from me. All of whom decided to cry in unison. It was a 9-hour flight. FML

by MLeguillon / 09/01/2014 at 12:34am / United States (Missouri) / Transportation

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

by disappointedjamaican / 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

by poorbastard / 08/30/2014 at 4:35am / Canada (Quebec) / Transportation

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2014 at 12:34am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love