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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36507) - you deserved it (2906)
On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was in a mall bathroom when two girls started making out in the stall next to me. Before I could leave, they got really into it and caused our shared wall to tear from its hinges and collapse on top of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23557) - you deserved it (1573)
On 09/11/2012 at 3:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I wanted to take a bubble bath with the jets in the bath that I haven't used in years. When I got in, it took me a while to realize that the jets had squirted out slime and a family of unidentifiable bugs that have probably been living there for years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17420) - you deserved it (7184)
On 09/06/2012 at 2:38am - misc - by juliannamelissa - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I'm so broke that I hand-washed my socks with a bar of soap that I stole from work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19151) - you deserved it (1714)
On 09/05/2012 at 2:27pm - money - by Lauraborealous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. I've been secretly taking Welsh lessons as a surprise for him, so when I was getting close, I whispered the Welsh for "Don't stop." He pulled out and accused me of cheating on him with his best friend. He won't believe anything else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22898) - you deserved it (3338)
On 09/04/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by gingerbetty - United Kingdom (Swansea)
Today, a girl told me she stopped eating cherries ever since her father choked on one when she was a kid. She later mentioned that she doesn't like to drive. I sarcastically asked, "Did your dad choke on a car too?" Nope, her two brothers died in a car accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6296) - you deserved it (36216)
On 09/04/2012 at 12:24am - misc - by Cherrish it - United States (California)
Today, my car was towed for the second time in front of my own house. They tried to tell me it was because they didn't think I lived there anymore. The person who had it towed had just spoken to me not three hours before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15839) - you deserved it (813)
On 08/29/2012 at 11:01am - money - by drixxy - United States (California)
Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I had forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5455) - you deserved it (22092)
On 08/27/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by dgilbs - United States (Michigan)
Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23170) - you deserved it (1720)
On 08/27/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by masterman - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was training a new girl at work. We're always told to find "common interests" with the people we are training to make it less awkward for them. Little did I know that our "common interest" would turn out to be my boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20819) - you deserved it (988)
On 08/26/2012 at 11:13pm - love - by damnit. (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my wife and I got in a 4-hour heated argument which resulted in her begging for a divorce and admitting that she cheated on me. This all started with us arguing about the instructions for our new IKEA table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21675) - you deserved it (1541)
On 08/26/2012 at 10:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19446) - you deserved it (2465)
On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (17369) - you deserved it (1307)
On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I had to hunt down and collect a stray dog's feces for my parasitology class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12123) - you deserved it (1996)
On 08/25/2012 at 3:11pm - animals - by missTyfied (woman) - Philippines (Rizal)
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19545) - you deserved it (1879)
On 08/15/2012 at 7:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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