Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (5 hours ago) | Search for a member
About nonononononono : Country girl🌾 dairy farmer🐮 15💁
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Today, I opened my front door to be greeted by what I can only describe as the stink of death. After moving furniture and lifting floorboards, frantically searching for whatever had died, I finally discovered the actual source of the stench - my girlfriend's feet. FML
Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML
Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML
Today, for the first time I sat next to a hot babe. I was feeling nervous, nevertheless, I managed to shyly ask her phone number. It’s only when I arrived back home that I realized there was a digit missing. FML
Friday 31 July 2015