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nokturn

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nokturn

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 206
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About nokturn : Hey welcome to my page :)
Just a quick note.. Boys stop messaging me about kik and skype I like girls!!!

nokturn's page activity

Visits<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 5:22pm<b>dafuck_15</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 8:51pm<b>thedude999</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 1:18am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 11:18am<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 1:20am<b>reallynow1910</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 10:57pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 3:30am<b>Dany93</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 2:43am<b>adameeo</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 2:28pm<b>CowTippingDwarfs</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 3:58am<b>FrankHotpants</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 1:39pm<b>Ben009</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 9:50pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 3:25pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 5:27pm<b>thesmithydan</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 4:02pm<b>BlackFames</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 3:40pm<b>jusufvelaj</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 2:40pm<b>ssm04</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 2:30pm

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nokturn's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30536) - you deserved it (49655)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML

#21123743
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39042) - you deserved it (6122)

On 04/26/2014 at 7:29pm - work - by caught out - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I witnessed my roommate telling a girl that he has "really healthy shits". I wanted to make fun of him, but he got laid by said girl and I went home to jerk off. FML

#21108665
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41140) - you deserved it (6815)

On 04/09/2014 at 5:12pm - intimacy - by damn (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I finally finished watching Dexter. I was more disappointed by the finale than the picture I later received of my girlfriend cheating on me. FML

#21095894
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39664) - you deserved it (4505)

On 03/25/2014 at 7:36am - misc - by disappointed - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I finally finished watching Dexter. I was more disappointed by the finale than the picture I later received of my girlfriend cheating on me. FML

#21095894
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39664) - you deserved it (4505)

On 03/25/2014 at 7:36am - misc - by disappointed - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I went on my sixth date with a guy I was beginning to really like. He asked if I'd mind if his friend Pete met up with us afterwards. I said sure. Turns out "Pete" is his penis. FML

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45658) - you deserved it (6696)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend tried explaining a duck flying into our living room and taking a shit everywhere as "paranormal activity". FML

#20963751
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35500) - you deserved it (3152)

On 11/19/2013 at 8:09pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I asked a co-worker why he was wearing sandals, as they are not allowed under our strict dress code. He got extremely angry with me and stormed off. Ten minutes later, I got called into our boss' office. Apparently, he told her that I walked up to him and asked to suck his toes. FML

#20956059
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38341) - you deserved it (3130)

On 11/13/2013 at 4:00am - work - by feetfreak (woman) - United States (California)

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

#20950369
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41600) - you deserved it (3063)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm - work - by thank god you'll only live once (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter's obsession with Canada got out way of hand when she was suspended for climbing up the flagpole, in an attempt to replace the flag with a red-and-white maple leaf one. FML

Today, I discovered that not only is my live-in mother-in-law a fan of Lady Gaga, she dances around the house naked to fully embrace the music. FML

#15693901
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29740) - you deserved it (3410)

On 04/08/2011 at 12:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, 3 of the 4 stalls were occupied in the rest room. I took the 4th stall. Upon sitting, I let out one of the longest, loudest farts I have done in a long time. Next, I hear "Hey, how's it going?". I was CORRECTLY identified by a co-worker hearing me fart. FML

#1487277
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49830) - you deserved it (9817)

On 04/30/2009 at 10:55am - work - by RckRagman (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I asked my boyfriend why he dates me. He immediately responded, "Well, TV shows are boring and predictable, so you're a good source of fresh and interesting drama." FML

#963044
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42810) - you deserved it (28540)

On 04/14/2009 at 12:44am - love - by dramaqueen (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my friends decided that I eat too many snacks. To emphasize this point, they went behind my back and printed 300 pages with my face and the words "NO SNACKS" on them. They were posted in every academic building on campus, including every room I have class in. FML

#594482
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63199) - you deserved it (9322)

On 03/25/2009 at 1:45am - misc - by face (man) - United States (Virginia)



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