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Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25132) - you deserved it (2334)
On 01/10/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by wowhoopla - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12058) - you deserved it (3458)
On 01/09/2010 at 8:25am - intimacy - by ohdeargodthatswrong (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49584) - you deserved it (2137)
On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, it was the first time my boyfriend had seen me naked. He grabs my breasts and then begins to sing "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts." He is 22. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11845) - you deserved it (3735)
On 01/04/2010 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by ambermcnulty - Sent from mobile version
Today, I saw a roach on my toilet. I thought it would be funny to pee on it. It jumped out, which scared me; I hit my head on the wall and started bleeding, then I peed all over me and the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5896) - you deserved it (29343)
On 12/22/2009 at 2:18pm - misc - by funyfunkid (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out where all my expensive bras and panties have been disappearing to. Apparently, while I'm at work, my fifteen year-old son's girlfriend has been stealing them after they have sex in my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16070) - you deserved it (1986)
On 12/21/2009 at 10:28pm - intimacy - by Secretisout (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while my boyfriend was sleeping, I got naked and sat on top of him. He woke up and I asked him if he would rather stay awake or go back to sleep, in hopes that he would stay awake and want to do some naughty stuff with me. His response? To grab my butt, and then go back to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5724) - you deserved it (8190)
On 12/21/2009 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I bought a laptop so that I could have dirty video chats with my internet girlfriend. I got home only to find that the only place I can get a decent wifi signal is in front of my mom's room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4638) - you deserved it (10981)
On 12/20/2009 at 7:20pm - intimacy - by thatguy (man) - United States (New York)
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