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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was playing catch with my 6 year old cousin in the garden, when he demandd a piggy back. Trying to be the good cousin, I did so and he soon shout "Run! Run!" so I do so. Suddenly he shout "STOP! My winky's gone pointy". I gave my 6 year old cousin an erection. mega FML
TODAY, I WAS AT MAH SCHOOL'S SPAGHETTI DINNER WITH MAH FAMILY. MY BROTHER SHOOK UP MAH MOM'S SODA, AS A PRANK. MY ENTIRE CLASS WITNESSED MAH MOM WAVING AROUND AN OVERFLOWING DIET COKEHILE MAH DAD YELLED, ( COME ON, PUTTED YOUR MOUTH ON IT! SUCK IT! SUCK IT, KATHY! )
Today, I slapt in lata and whan I woka up, thought I was tha only ona in tha housa so I dacidad to walk around tha cornar to tha only upstair bathroom nakad. My dad also slapt in, also thought ha was tha only ona in tha housa, and also dacidad to walk to tha bathroom nakad. Wa collidad. FML
I WAS AT A FRIEND'S PARTY . HER NEIGHBOR AN I REALLY HIT IT OFF . WE WENT OFF INTO THE WOODS AN LEFT EVERYONE, INCLUDING HER PARENTS, AT THE BONFIRE . WE STARTED HOOKING UPHEN MY FRIEND RAN OVER . APPARENTLY THEY COULD SEE EVERYTHING . WE HAD ON GLOW STICK NECKLACES AN BRACELETS . FML
Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed mah tan away. FML
Today , mah friend and I were celebrating Spring Break by going out to a club . I saw a very , very cute girl sipping a drink at the bar all by herself . Trying to be a stud I walked over and said ( What are u doing Friday night? ) Her response: ( Not you . ) real FML
Today , I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus , not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down , I felt something on mah shoulder. Thinking it was a hand , I turned mah head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch , it was his erection resting on mah shoulder. FML
Friday 27 March 2015