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nisey3313

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nisey3313

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  • Number of visits : 4787
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>justme_79</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 3:35am<b>UnluckyGenius</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 3:54am<b>perdix</b> - the 09/13/2010 at 10:49pm

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nisey3313's favorite FMLs

Today, I arrived at my parents house for dinner. When I got there, I noticed that they had gay pride flags hanging from the porch, and gay rights bumper stickers plastered to their cars. There was also a huge "We accept you, Nick" banner hanging from the garage. I'M NOT GAY! FML

#108815
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84885) - you deserved it (5657)

On 02/22/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
516 comments

I agree, your life sucks (244523) - you deserved it (82521)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML

#29912
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (171880) - you deserved it (49580)

On 02/12/2009 at 2:45am - misc - by alhummel21 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd probably like to." FML

#21834
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80248) - you deserved it (24791)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:08pm - misc - by peacock_mina19 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I walked past a girl in the cafeteria and she threw up. Naturally, a crowd was drawn. Her friend asked her what was wrong. She pointed at me and said, "Get him away from me!" I had never met this girl. FML

#7894
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43136) - you deserved it (2439)

On 02/04/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by disgusting (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I took a big sip of water while on a bus. It went down the wrong pipe, causing me to cough and hack loudly. The old woman sitting across from me asked if I was okay. Jokingly, I said, "Just dying." She replied, "You too, huh?" FML

#7761
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8745) - you deserved it (29088)

On 02/04/2009 at 10:48am - misc - by suicide (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML

#4708
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35608) - you deserved it (7631)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:29pm - misc - by frankrizzo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML

#4642
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34829) - you deserved it (5412)

On 02/01/2009 at 10:48am - intimacy - by nicknack22 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was waiting after work in a parking lot for my ride and was dancing a little to keep warm. Next thing I know the cops pull up to me and said that someone called in to report someone dancing in an empty parking lot. FML

#4312
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25964) - you deserved it (2805)

On 01/31/2009 at 7:01pm - misc - by HumanNature - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was waiting after work in a parking lot for my ride and was dancing a little to keep warm. Next thing I know the cops pull up to me and said that someone called in to report someone dancing in an empty parking lot. FML

#4312
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25964) - you deserved it (2805)

On 01/31/2009 at 7:01pm - misc - by HumanNature - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went onto my computer and found a cyber sex conversation between my sister and my girlfriend. FML

#768
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36194) - you deserved it (2827)

On 12/31/2008 at 10:49pm - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, at the Eurostar customs, an officer asked me if I had packed my luggage myself. I teasingly answered "No, I was helped by a member of Al Qaeda." which earned me a body and luggage search and a missed train. FML

#510
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6547) - you deserved it (58533)

On 12/14/2008 at 12:15am - misc - by Behemoth2 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I pointed out to my girlfriend that she wasn't jealous. She replied, "Well actually, I am, I just can't prove it cause no one else is interested in you". FML

#466
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25162) - you deserved it (3773)

On 12/08/2008 at 2:26am - love - by Numou - Sent from mobile version



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