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ninjuh_wingman

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ninjuh_wingman

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 March 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11223
  • Number of comments : 507
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ninjuh_wingman : I'm a ninja. I do many ninja things. If you drop by, you saw nothing. I don't exist. \( ̄<  ̄)>

ninjuh_wingman's page activity

Visits<b>am1717</b> - 8 hours ago<b>LivToFail</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 6:26pm<b>indigohero</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 5:51pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 10:57am<b>Moskaaa7</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 6:40pm<b>lahutchins</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 3:34pm<b>cprad11</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:23am<b>Emyka</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 6:09am<b>LilMissCanadian</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 10:05pm<b>cdgrayson</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 10:27am<b>suprisebitch</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 10:07am<b>Shay_Shay97</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 8:30am<b>ciaraash</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 8:22pm<b>CheshireHalli</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 7:31pm<b>TacoMan02</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 12:53pm<b>_May2Brown_</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 1:53pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 10:53am<b>Ghif123</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 6:44pm

Fucked!<b>lahutchins</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 4:25am<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 6:47am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 7:52am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 7:10pm

ninjuh_wingman's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of ninjuh_wingman's badges

ninjuh_wingman's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

#2005903
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31245) - you deserved it (90387)

On 05/17/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by Ohshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I scored two prime baseball tickets from a supplier at work. I phoned my dad to tell him the good news. He said that's great, my brother and him would love to see the game. I said, no, I'm taking you to the game. He told me I was being selfish and hung up the phone. FML

#1926739
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66514) - you deserved it (2915)

On 05/14/2009 at 10:17am - misc - by Hank (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my cell phone rang while I was still asleep. I picked it up, half asleep, only to find it was a wrong number from some guy. Three minutes later I receive a text message saying "Hey, you sound cute..." from the same number. I looked to see if he was local. I'm that desperate. FML

Today, I gave my 16 year old step daughter and her friends a lecture on respecting other people's privacy. Two hours later, I accidentally walked into her room without knocking. She and her friends were giving each other bikini waxes. Now her friends call me the hypocritical pervert. FML

#1885333
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15687) - you deserved it (77748)

On 05/12/2009 at 8:23pm - kids - by firewait (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's the five year anniversary of my father's death. I was cuddling with my boyfriend and crying about how much I missed him. He replied with, "Sometimes, I think you just like to hear yourself talk." FML

#1845741
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90991) - you deserved it (10923)

On 05/11/2009 at 3:46pm - misc - by bezoar10 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

#1815413
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81660) - you deserved it (9001)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by airport (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up happier than I've ever been because last night I hooked up with the girl I have loved for almost a year and I thought I would never get with her. This morning I saw that her status on Facebook was "FML". FML

#1782670
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80449) - you deserved it (7014)

On 05/09/2009 at 4:18pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized my wedding ring was missing. Turns out, my son had taken it to give to a girl he likes in the 2nd grade. FML

#1706797
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76904) - you deserved it (8636)

On 05/06/2009 at 11:47pm - kids - by fmal (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, was my first meeting with business partners as I am new to the team. Instead of saying that I was looking forward to "stretching my legs" or "spreading my wings", I told them I was anxious to start "spreading my legs". FML

#1683242
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61531) - you deserved it (21384)

On 05/06/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had an ultrasound in fear of testicular cancer. I apparently signed papers allowing an intern to do it for practice. She was in her early 20s and smoking hot so as she was rubbing jelly on my testes I got an erection. FML

#1525413
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76794) - you deserved it (26018)

On 05/01/2009 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by erectioninfection (man) - United States

Today, I met my paternal grandfather for the first time. I’ve spent the last three months tracking him down. I poured my heart out and told about how much this meant to me. He told me I had a nice rack and asked for a cigarette. FML

#1475511
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87065) - you deserved it (8577)

On 04/29/2009 at 10:11pm - love - by cgold (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was playing one on one soccer with a girl like. I accidentally kicked the ball right into her face. The ball rolled back towards me and as I was running to see if she was ok, I kicked the ball... right into her face again. FML

#1452410
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68203) - you deserved it (30647)

On 04/29/2009 at 10:35am - misc - by hyper12332 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend when we started messing around. Things were getting really hot when he gets a call from his best friend whose grandfather had just died. As they were talking and I heard her crying, he unzips his pants and mouths, "She won't know." FML

#1404603
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69803) - you deserved it (7292)

On 04/27/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was hanging out at my school with some friends when my mom came to pick me up. A girl I knew wanted a hug before I left. I turned around to hug her and a clip on my backpack got stuck on her tank top. I tuned away the clip pulled the shirt ripping it and exposing her naked chest. FML

#1342086
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68391) - you deserved it (8510)

On 04/26/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Mikey (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while walking through the halls of my high school, me and my boyfriend shared a quick kiss. A young teacher walks by and tells us to stop due to Personal Display of Affection rules at our school. She then looks at my boyfriend and tells him he could do so much better. FML

#1328143
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68384) - you deserved it (6375)

On 04/25/2009 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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