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Offline (the 10/20/2016 at 7:24am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 February 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14281
  • Number of comments : 511
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About ninjuh_wingman : I'm a ninja. I do many ninja things. If you drop by, you saw nothing. I don't exist...except I do. I'm watching you.

\( ̄<  ̄)>

ninjuh_wingman's page activity

Visits<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 1:03pm<b>Dr_Awesome654</b> - the 09/25/2016 at 1:07am<b>Poyzin7323</b> - the 09/03/2016 at 5:12pm<b>Soniyaaaa</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 9:09pm<b>AAHHHHH</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 1:39am<b>Myeyesbleed</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 12:49am<b>keithsbooty</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 2:24pm<b>Moskaaa7</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 2:29pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 6:33pm<b>slappygecko</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 11:10am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 7:26am<b>rosieee777</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 6:28pm<b>xxsarsarxx</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 6:13pm<b>cuponoods</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 5:50am<b>nezzner_72</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 11:38pm<b>Nina825</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 4:34am<b>am1717</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 10:45am<b>LivToFail</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 6:26pm

Fucked!<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 7:03pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 12:33am<b>Moskaaa7</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 10:53pm<b>lahutchins</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 4:25am<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 6:47am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 7:52am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 7:10pm

ninjuh_wingman's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.


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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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ninjuh_wingman's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML

by fd_uplife / 07/05/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years who had taken a job in a new city last month came into town and told me that she had slept with a co-worker last Friday. Last Friday I was incredibly lonely but I turned down a very attractive woman because I didn't want to hurt my girlfriend. FML

by BrokenHearted / 07/04/2009 at 5:11pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 2:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I was testing for figure skating. I was wearing a brand new custom dress that was a halter top. On my first move, I tripped and fell flat on my face. Immediately after retaking the move, my dress snapped open, exposing myself to the judges. FML

by sk8rgurl / 06/28/2009 at 7:09pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband of one week lost his wedding ring while we were preparing for a dinner party. After a thorough search and no luck, I started to cry. He told me to quit being a drama queen because we had guests. He then got drunk with his friends, puked on the patio, and called me a bitch. FML

by honeymoonisover / 06/28/2009 at 12:05pm / United States (Arkansas) / Love

Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2009 at 4:20am / Japan / Transportation

Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2009 at 12:01am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I was shopping for my little sister's birthday. She loves manga. I've never read manga, so I bought a couple of novels from the "popular" shelf. Turns out if they have white covers it means they are "adult" books. I bought my sister a "lolicon" manga - filled with prebuscent naked girls. FML

by loli-conned / 06/21/2009 at 6:10pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Kids

Today, I was browsing my computer to find naked pictures of my ex-girlfriend. I decided it'd be funny to photoshop a penis onto one of the pictures. I'm straight and the new picture turned me on more than before. FML

by AlexK / 06/18/2009 at 7:39pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Love

Today, I was on the phone with my best friend who lives out of town. He was strangely quiet. Later that day I asked him why he didn't talk much. He admitted he was jacking off to the sound of my voice. FML

by automaticfail_00 / 06/17/2009 at 7:27pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my sister and I got fitted for bridesmaid's dresses. It was pretty sheer material, so I took off my bright pink thong and left it on the changing room hanger. As I was looking at myself in the mirror, a woman came out of the room holding my thong. She had tried it on. FML

by anonymous1 / 06/13/2009 at 8:43pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha" stuck in my head all day so I decided to let it out by doing a slutty dance, including spinning around the support pole in the kitchen. I heard a noise outside and saw my friend's dad had been cleaning the windows. With a boner. FML

by sluttydancer / 06/10/2009 at 9:51am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I decided to get a little frisky in bed. After we were done we lay spent on our bed then only to hear weird noises coming from our doorway. To our surprise not only had our daughter taken her first steps but has been watching and now making the noises as well. FML

by PreciousIve / 06/09/2009 at 11:36am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after masturbating in the shower, I heard my phone go off outside the bathroom. After my mom saw me get my phone to check my messages she said "I think you're addicted to that", to which I said "but it feels so good and every guy does it." She was talking about how I text people a lot. FML

by Jon / 06/07/2009 at 2:47am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy