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ninjuh_wingman

Offline (the 06/29/2015 at 7:25pm) | Search for a member

ninjuh_wingman

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 March 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9733
  • Number of comments : 498
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ninjuh_wingman : I'm a ninja. I like doing ninja stuff. That is all.

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ninjuh_wingman's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting it on with a girl I've been talking to for three months. She's a year younger than me and it was her first time. So, I went easy. After five minutes she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said I remind her of her dad. FML

#4346574
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75204) - you deserved it (6872)

On 08/06/2009 at 10:03pm - love - by Jeremy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking around Walmart feeling pretty good about myself as I received numerous looks from guys in passing. All of a sudden a man approached me to tell me that my dress was extremely see-through. And, since I was wearing a thong, he and everyone else could totally see my ass. FML

#4178652
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12629) - you deserved it (56772)

On 07/31/2009 at 9:43am - misc - by EmBAREassed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend when I said "I wish all the weight I gained just went to my boobs." His reply was, "They'd be HUGE." FML

#4076767
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39564) - you deserved it (24363)

On 07/27/2009 at 9:49am - love - by not-that-fat (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend said he couldn't come to my grandfather's funeral because he was at his cottage and couldn't make it. Later that day, when driving home from the graveyard I saw him walking down the street, with another girl. FML

#3995959
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51307) - you deserved it (2873)

On 07/24/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Lyingboyfriend (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking through a heavy door at work, so I reached behind me to catch it so it wouldn't slam shut. Little did I know that my boss was walking through right after me. Instead of catching the door, I caught a handful of his crotch. FML

#3982111
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48279) - you deserved it (5144)

On 07/23/2009 at 4:23pm - work - by bossgroper (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML

#3967657
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72454) - you deserved it (4481)

On 07/23/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Rory (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

#3894865
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53780) - you deserved it (3102)

On 07/20/2009 at 12:04am - love - by thicklysettled (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out the real cause of my dog's illness that she had just recovered from. When my sister took her in to see the vet, the vet said my dog was constipated, and swallowed something orange. That orange thing happened to be my favorite thong. FML

#3818838
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34729) - you deserved it (5588)

On 07/17/2009 at 12:02am - animals - by orangethonglover (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my friend posted my picture on Craigslist under the "men seeking men" section. I got 16 replies with 2 hours. He then decided to post another picture of me under "men seeking women" to compare results. The only reply I got was from a man. FML

#3713033
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46216) - you deserved it (3873)

On 07/13/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML

#3661940
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44081) - you deserved it (5909)

On 07/11/2009 at 5:10am - work - by grannysmack (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years admitted why his pet name for me is "his beautiful swan". Apparently, the first few years we were dating, he and his friends secretly referred to me as "the ugly duckling" because my sister was so much hotter. FML

#3611862
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53475) - you deserved it (3127)

On 07/09/2009 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I caught my little brother peeping at my friend getting dressed in the bathroom. When I asked him what he was doing he said "I'm just doing what Ray does to you while you're in the bathroom." Ray is my new step dad. FML

#3563535
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (126160) - you deserved it (4625)

On 07/07/2009 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by Nicole (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, being on my boyfriend's street bike for ten minutes gave me an orgasm. My boyfriend of three years, who constantly tries so hard to get me to, has never given me an orgasm. FML

#3528123
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52082) - you deserved it (6495)

On 07/06/2009 at 3:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML

#3503607
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65654) - you deserved it (3709)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:46pm - love - by fd_uplife (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years who had taken a job in a new city last month came into town and told me that she had slept with a co-worker last Friday. Last Friday I was incredibly lonely but I turned down a very attractive woman because I didn't want to hurt my girlfriend. FML

#3484345
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54153) - you deserved it (5205)

On 07/04/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by BrokenHearted (man) - United States (Georgia)



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