Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ninjuh_wingman

Offline (the 09/28/2014 at 10:17pm) | Search for a member

ninjuh_wingman

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 March 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7570
  • Number of comments : 498
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ninjuh_wingman : I'm a ninja. I like doing ninja stuff. That is all.

ninjuh_wingman's page activity

Visits<b>ryamn</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 6:46am<b>kerripjones</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 8:17am<b>letmehavemytea</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 10:24am<b>Si123</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:48pm<b>hiiamahuskey</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 11:09pm<b>KatNipped</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 10:38am<b>ThatEngineerGirl</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 9:40am<b>chinaski7628</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 9:17am<b>Marie54321</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:08am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:43pm<b>7Maverick</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 11:26pm<b>Roskie</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 12:29pm<b>dyehardxen</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 11:45am<b>CFB_FRS</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 7:49am<b>CammyGal</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 9:52pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 9:19pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 7:27am<b>amberr_harperr</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 6:41am

ninjuh_wingman's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of ninjuh_wingman's badges

ninjuh_wingman's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a clothing store. I tried on a dress, but decided it was too much for me. Taking it off, I realize my hair was tangled in the big security button. The employees had to bring me to the front of the store, lay me on the counter, and take the button out in front of a laughing crowd. FML

#4483949
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38796) - you deserved it (3788)

On 08/12/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by ForeverEmbarrassed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I came home on leave from a 7 month deployment to Iraq. I wanted to see my girlfriend today, but she needed to spend time with her sick grandmother. As it turns out, her sick grandmother and my cousin are the same person. FML

#4467234
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55478) - you deserved it (3058)

On 08/12/2009 at 2:01am - love - by FUSMC (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was getting it on with a girl I've been talking to for three months. She's a year younger than me and it was her first time. So, I went easy. After five minutes she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said I remind her of her dad. FML

#4346574
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73061) - you deserved it (6666)

On 08/06/2009 at 10:03pm - love - by Jeremy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking around Walmart feeling pretty good about myself as I received numerous looks from guys in passing. All of a sudden a man approached me to tell me that my dress was extremely see-through. And, since I was wearing a thong, he and everyone else could totally see my ass. FML

#4178652
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11533) - you deserved it (54657)

On 07/31/2009 at 9:43am - misc - by EmBAREassed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend when I said "I wish all the weight I gained just went to my boobs." His reply was, "They'd be HUGE." FML

#4076767
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37737) - you deserved it (23628)

On 07/27/2009 at 9:49am - love - by not-that-fat (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend said he couldn't come to my grandfather's funeral because he was at his cottage and couldn't make it. Later that day, when driving home from the graveyard I saw him walking down the street, with another girl. FML

#3995959
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50962) - you deserved it (2856)

On 07/24/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Lyingboyfriend (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking through a heavy door at work, so I reached behind me to catch it so it wouldn't slam shut. Little did I know that my boss was walking through right after me. Instead of catching the door, I caught a handful of his crotch. FML

#3982111
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46047) - you deserved it (4924)

On 07/23/2009 at 4:23pm - work - by bossgroper (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML

#3967657
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69431) - you deserved it (4238)

On 07/23/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Rory (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

#3894865
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50928) - you deserved it (2887)

On 07/20/2009 at 12:04am - love - by thicklysettled (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out the real cause of my dog's illness that she had just recovered from. When my sister took her in to see the vet, the vet said my dog was constipated, and swallowed something orange. That orange thing happened to be my favorite thong. FML

#3818838
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34412) - you deserved it (5568)

On 07/17/2009 at 12:02am - animals - by orangethonglover (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my friend posted my picture on Craigslist under the "men seeking men" section. I got 16 replies with 2 hours. He then decided to post another picture of me under "men seeking women" to compare results. The only reply I got was from a man. FML

#3713033
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43815) - you deserved it (3653)

On 07/13/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML

#3661940
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43751) - you deserved it (5880)

On 07/11/2009 at 5:10am - work - by grannysmack (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years admitted why his pet name for me is "his beautiful swan". Apparently, the first few years we were dating, he and his friends secretly referred to me as "the ugly duckling" because my sister was so much hotter. FML

#3611862
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53135) - you deserved it (3116)

On 07/09/2009 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I caught my little brother peeping at my friend getting dressed in the bathroom. When I asked him what he was doing he said "I'm just doing what Ray does to you while you're in the bathroom." Ray is my new step dad. FML

#3563535
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (124407) - you deserved it (4582)

On 07/07/2009 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by Nicole (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, being on my boyfriend's street bike for ten minutes gave me an orgasm. My boyfriend of three years, who constantly tries so hard to get me to, has never given me an orgasm. FML

#3528123
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51762) - you deserved it (6470)

On 07/06/2009 at 3:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: