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ninjapiratejesus

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ninjapiratejesus

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 464
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ninjapiratejesus : I love food, running, video games, and my boyfriend :) What else could I need in life?

I am hoping to cosplay as Citra from Far Cry 3 in the near future...

I like all music; especially anything by Muse, Radiohead, Imagine Dragons, Metric, The Killers, The Gorillaz, Of Monsters and Men, Coldplay, The Shins, U2, Deadmau5, and Glitch Mob.

The Walking Dead is amazing.

ninjapiratejesus's page activity

Visits<b>mattrd</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 12:05pm<b>Korohi</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 1:30am<b>nomallama</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:14pm<b>Thales_</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 6:09pm<b>cokeman666</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:43am<b>Pwn17</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 4:56am<b>starlight300</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 8:55am<b>snydeeli000</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 4:14pm<b>Rilerz6996</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 4:43pm<b>philbelfrage</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 2:32pm<b>Blackcatluck</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 10:39pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 02/21/2013 at 5:10am<b>kintazaxD</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 10:36pm<b>tacojauns</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 12:11am<b>sythe511</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 11:14pm<b>MrBrightside21</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 10:51pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 01/19/2013 at 5:47am<b>dumpus102</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 4:05pm

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ninjapiratejesus's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out why my cups of tea have been tasting a bit funny. It turns out my kettle is full of ants, so every time I boil water to make tea, the ants get re-boiled along with it. FML

#17329330
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29157) - you deserved it (15062)

On 08/01/2011 at 4:32am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
505 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119995) - you deserved it (5967)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, my kitchen is flooded, and according to my landlord, this is normal, because it rained last night. Funny, I thought the purpose of a roof was to stop water from getting in. Guess I was wrong. Silly me. FML

#16559634
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40174) - you deserved it (3275)

On 06/08/2011 at 7:22am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I found out my cat is allergic to ME. No kidding. FML

#15703815
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31426) - you deserved it (3819)

On 04/09/2011 at 1:32am - animals - by blehhx - United States

Today, I was hanging out with the guy I like. All of a sudden, he pulls out a small vial of his blood to give to me, proving his undying love. Curious, I asked where he had gotten the blood. His answer? A razor blade. In his nose. FML

#15479009
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29150) - you deserved it (4869)

On 03/25/2011 at 4:50am - misc - by radicaloser - United States (Oregon)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35873) - you deserved it (30916)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67480) - you deserved it (6339)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my grandma walked into my room and asked if the thing lying on my nightstand was a computer. I said ''Grandma, that's a clock.'' After staring at me, confused for a few seconds, she then farted, and left my room. FML

#13949092
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36836) - you deserved it (5035)

On 11/23/2010 at 12:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

#7420693
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46218) - you deserved it (7446)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was riding the train home, and I sat in the row in front of a homeless woman. I noticed an old man staring at me. I got off the train after a long 6 stops, and the old man who had been staring at me walks up to me and says "The lady behind you was flicking lice onto you the whole time." FML

#6949420
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38323) - you deserved it (2131)

On 12/26/2009 at 12:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25929) - you deserved it (11618)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML

#6692026
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28447) - you deserved it (12261)

On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to have my eyebrows waxed for the first time. After signing in the receptionist looked at me and said "Lip wax?". I told her no, my eyebrows. She sat me down and the waxer walked up, took one look at me and said "Lip wax?" FML

#6230893
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27000) - you deserved it (8757)

On 11/09/2009 at 5:27pm - misc - by LoserOfTheYear (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked into the kitchen and saw a note my roomate posted. As I got close to read it I was attacked by a very pissed off cat. The note said "Left window open last night, stray cat got in. Watch out he isn't friendly." FML

#4977727
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38693) - you deserved it (2637)

On 09/01/2009 at 2:51pm - animals - by Catscratch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML

#3419869
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46829) - you deserved it (10552)

On 07/02/2009 at 3:22am - misc - by DaveAlmighty (man) - United States (California)



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