nikkipettyfer

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Offline (the 05/01/2016 at 4:29am)

nikkipettyfer

342Fucked!

nikkipettyfer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11130
  • Number of comments : 115
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 31 posted

About nikkipettyfer : 😈

nikkipettyfer's page activity

Visits<b>DMo42</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 8:48pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 09/25/2016 at 7:42pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 4:11pm<b>Zatert</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 1:13am<b>bubblemania</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 12:20am<b>seenoevil818</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 9:45pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 4:59pm<b>gar2014</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 3:54am<b>Corey122726</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 2:37pm<b>duduv2</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 12:12am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 6:21pm<b>amayraniescobar</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 9:54pm<b>FlamingColor</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 11:43am<b>loganswann</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 7:09am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 3:00pm<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:40pm<b>kawayi</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 2:30pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 2:57pm

Fucked!<b>masschris</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 4:53pm<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 8:08am<b>psmith78332</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 3:19pm<b>mxgirl1998</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 1:48pm<b>18drakerad</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 1:19pm<b>mrknowsitall</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 1:18pm<b>prodigy57271</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 9:25am<b>enginsteve</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 9:17am<b>dawood_k</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 8:57am<b>duduv2</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 8:18am<b>Shemp_5</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 7:58am<b>ironhead</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 4:22am<b>ciaraash</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 11:23pm<b>DakotaEdwards</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 9:45pm<b>Wiringify</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:29pm<b>pete9913</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:22pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:08pm<b>AZ_Hockey_Dude</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 7:43pm

nikkipettyfer's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of nikkipettyfer's badges

nikkipettyfer's favorite FMLs

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend asked me, "Are you sure you're a guy?" I still have no idea what that was for. FML

by Ihatemylife / 03/03/2013 at 7:17am / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Intimacy

Today, after an argument with my pianist girlfriend about how bad my favourite song would sound on the piano, she stormed out of the room crying, leaving behind a CD. It was the piano version of the song she'd made for me. FML

by douchegamer / 03/02/2013 at 10:38pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, my roommate told me that she wants to get some of those "My Family" stickers for her car. She's single and has no children. What does she want to get? One for her, and one for her goldfish. Sadly, this is probably one of the most intelligent things she's said all week. FML

by dumbass for a flatmate / 03/02/2013 at 9:35pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, after spending almost an hour in the dentist's waiting room, watching other people get called in for their appointments, I finally lost my patience and asked the receptionist what was taking so long. I'd forgotten to sign in. FML

by oops / 03/02/2013 at 1:32pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML

by sn-511 / 03/01/2013 at 5:54pm / Italy (Campania) / Intimacy

Today, I was in bed when I rolled over and saw a hand right beside my head. I freaked out and nearly peed myself, just to realize that it was the huggable heart pillow my boyfriend had given to me on Valentine's Day. FML

by girlymae / 02/27/2013 at 2:59am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

by Frostbitten / 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison / 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Health

Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML

by soaked / 02/25/2013 at 2:16pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrified, I stopped playing 10 minutes in. Tonight, I kept hearing noises outside. When I peered out through the window, a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shrieked in absolute terror; he burst out laughing. It was my boyfriend. FML

by stillfuckingcrying / 02/24/2013 at 4:20pm / Sweden (Kalmar Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, the guy I like asked me out for the first time. It's a good thing he did it over Facebook, because I started shaking and almost threw up. I don't know how I'm going to function on our date next week. FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2013 at 2:31am / United States / Love

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML

by jealouspussy / 02/20/2013 at 1:55am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went shopping with my two-year-old nephew. He threw a tantrum in the middle of the store because I would not show him my "boobies". A man came up to us and said I should do what my nephew wanted. FML

by Lesser / 02/17/2013 at 3:02am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

by Notaplacetogo / 02/17/2013 at 1:45am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while I was babysitting, the little girl wanted to show me a picture that her mom had just sent to the family iPad via iMessage. Trying to be helpful, I clicked iMessage, only to see pictures of her father's erect penis. She won't stop asking about the "hotdog" in the picture. FML

by Scarlett / 02/16/2013 at 1:03am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids