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nikkiluck1

Offline (the 08/25/2015 at 4:16am) | Search for a member

nikkiluck1

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  • Number of visits : 207
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nikkiluck1's FML badges

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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nikkiluck1's favorite FMLs

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23344) - you deserved it (6097)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, it's been a week since I started farting in my sleep for no apparent reason. It's so frequent and so foul-smelling that my husband and I are both losing sleep and are having to take afternoon naps to make up for it. FML

#21457512
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18554) - you deserved it (2176)

On 08/18/2015 at 6:59am - misc - by Fartnonymous (woman) - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was scared to open up to him because I had lost people in the past by doing so. After an hour of him trying to convince me to share my thoughts with him, I finally agreed to tell him some things that were worrying me. He broke up with me a minute later. FML

#21454874
101 comments

Today, I watched a young shop assistant try her hardest to flirt with my 20-year-old son. When he continued to be totally oblivious, she outright invited him back to her flat. When he asked, "What for?" a piece of my soul died at how completely I have failed as a father. FML

#21442690
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32032) - you deserved it (4212)

On 07/16/2015 at 6:21pm - kids - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML

#21442166
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31516) - you deserved it (3069)

On 07/15/2015 at 6:02pm - misc - by Razz - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my idiot boss placed an expensive order for anti-bullying banners that read: "Take a stand against bullying!" This would be fine if I didn't work in a specialized school for children in wheelchairs. FML

#21436683
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22129) - you deserved it (1524)

On 07/05/2015 at 5:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML

#21432853
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25991) - you deserved it (3364)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by stillhungry - United States (California)

Today, at my work in a call centre, a man called up on a very quiet line to report a car accident on his father's behalf because his father was deaf. I asked him to ask his dad if he was OK after the accident. I'd misheard him and he had said "dead", not "deaf". He started crying. FML

#21430016
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29925) - you deserved it (3825)

On 06/22/2015 at 7:35am - work - by Iamsosorry (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, when I turned on the TV, there was a picture of a wanted murderer. The picture looked just like my boyfriend. FML

#21430015
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27420) - you deserved it (2370)

On 06/22/2015 at 7:26am - misc - by 1234 - United States (Florida)

Today, at the supermarket, a woman came up to me and said I looked just like her son, who was killed in Afghanistan. She tearfully asked if she could hug me "one last time". It was a little weird, but I let her. 10 minutes later, at the checkout, I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML

#21425871
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32827) - you deserved it (4828)

On 06/14/2015 at 9:41am - money - by Justin 'Cuntface' Bieber III (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML

#21409473
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31559) - you deserved it (2349)

On 05/13/2015 at 1:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend's mum publicly shamed him on Facebook after she caught him having sex under her roof today. Everyone thought it was hilarious, except me. Not because I'm ashamed, but because I'm over 300 miles away right now. FML

#21407667
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37014) - you deserved it (2024)

On 05/10/2015 at 8:16am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I pulled a piece of dental floss out of my ass. How it got there is one of life's great mysteries. FML

#21403757
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31537) - you deserved it (4635)

On 05/03/2015 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I failed a major exam. It wasn't because I didn't prepare for it, though. I failed because somebody sneezed during it and I said "bless you." Apparently, that's classed as cheating. FML

Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML

#21402824
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30778) - you deserved it (5968)

On 05/01/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by why? - United States



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