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nikkiluck1

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nikkiluck1

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  • Number of visits : 188
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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nikkiluck1's favorite FMLs

Today, I watched a young shop assistant try her hardest to flirt with my 20-year-old son. When he continued to be totally oblivious, she outright invited him back to her flat. When he asked, "What for?" a piece of my soul died at how completely I have failed as a father. FML

#21442690
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31640) - you deserved it (4196)

On 07/16/2015 at 6:21pm - kids - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML

#21442166
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30962) - you deserved it (2863)

On 07/15/2015 at 6:02pm - misc - by Razz - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my idiot boss placed an expensive order for anti-bullying banners that read: "Take a stand against bullying!" This would be fine if I didn't work in a specialized school for children in wheelchairs. FML

#21436683
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22096) - you deserved it (1519)

On 07/05/2015 at 5:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML

#21432853
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25961) - you deserved it (3359)

On 06/27/2015 at 2:37pm - love - by stillhungry - United States (California)

Today, at my work in a call centre, a man called up on a very quiet line to report a car accident on his father's behalf because his father was deaf. I asked him to ask his dad if he was OK after the accident. I'd misheard him and he had said "dead", not "deaf". He started crying. FML

#21430016
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29270) - you deserved it (3556)

On 06/22/2015 at 7:35am - work - by Iamsosorry (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, when I turned on the TV, there was a picture of a wanted murderer. The picture looked just like my boyfriend. FML

#21430015
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27393) - you deserved it (2369)

On 06/22/2015 at 7:26am - misc - by 1234 - United States (Florida)

Today, at the supermarket, a woman came up to me and said I looked just like her son, who was killed in Afghanistan. She tearfully asked if she could hug me "one last time". It was a little weird, but I let her. 10 minutes later, at the checkout, I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML

#21425871
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31887) - you deserved it (4453)

On 06/14/2015 at 9:41am - money - by Justin 'Cuntface' Bieber III (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML

#21409473
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31527) - you deserved it (2348)

On 05/13/2015 at 1:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend's mum publicly shamed him on Facebook after she caught him having sex under her roof today. Everyone thought it was hilarious, except me. Not because I'm ashamed, but because I'm over 300 miles away right now. FML

#21407667
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36987) - you deserved it (2023)

On 05/10/2015 at 8:16am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I pulled a piece of dental floss out of my ass. How it got there is one of life's great mysteries. FML

#21403757
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31525) - you deserved it (4635)

On 05/03/2015 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I failed a major exam. It wasn't because I didn't prepare for it, though. I failed because somebody sneezed during it and I said "bless you." Apparently, that's classed as cheating. FML

Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML

#21402824
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29906) - you deserved it (5558)

On 05/01/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by why? - United States

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

#21401745
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33879) - you deserved it (4529)

On 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is not a screamer nor a moaner, she's a biter. My arm is getting stitches right now. FML

#21393183
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29044) - you deserved it (2884)

On 04/13/2015 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML

#21387543
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31991) - you deserved it (2504)

On 04/04/2015 at 1:32pm - health - by fuck right off (man) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)



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