Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nihongoso

Offline (the 07/21/2015 at 4:18am) | Search for a member

nihongoso

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6682
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nihongoso's page activity

Visits<b>SerpentBoy</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 5:53pm

nihongoso's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of nihongoso's badges

nihongoso's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

#18167673
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16096) - you deserved it (36028)

On 11/05/2011 at 8:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML

#18153608
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36327) - you deserved it (8623)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:29am - love - by fmlifer - United States (California)

Today, at the nail salon, a Korean woman was making fun of me. I kindly told her, in Korean, that I understood. She kindly told me, in English, that she didn't care. FML

#18150713
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44246) - you deserved it (3963)

On 11/03/2011 at 8:16pm - work - by EunJung - United States

Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML

#18139418
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30850) - you deserved it (5341)

On 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I yelled at my boyfriend for smoking in the house, because I didn't want the house to smell like smoke. While doing so, I knocked over a candle and lit the couch on fire. FML

#18137309
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30610) - you deserved it (13619)

On 11/02/2011 at 9:50am - love - by S. Bauer (woman) - Portugal

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to break up with him since he's always busy, and I haven't seen or spoke to him in almost 2 months. I arrived to find out from his landlord that he'd moved out 3 weeks ago, leaving a note saying that we were over. FML

#18135824
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29257) - you deserved it (7902)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:21am - love - by melikeyturtles - United States

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29588) - you deserved it (3443)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

#18121591
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35015) - you deserved it (3441)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm - love - by poopcoloredeyes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML

#18098889
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23407) - you deserved it (9982)

On 10/28/2011 at 8:44pm - misc - by ricksterile - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

#18095977
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29413) - you deserved it (5285)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was at work at a nursing home I was attempting to dress a woman for bed. She popped me a left hook and I had to ask the nurse to look at my jaw. After my nurse said I was okay she asked me to continue getting the woman dressed for bed. She hit me 5 more times. FML

#18094107
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23652) - you deserved it (2292)

On 10/28/2011 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Just as she took her shirt off, her phone rang. It was her mom demanding she return home. Now I've been cockblocked, and my girlfriend's mom seems to be a god damn clairvoyant. Awesome. FML

#18092758
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30557) - you deserved it (5344)

On 10/27/2011 at 10:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was rear-ended by a girl barely out of her teens. I got out of my car and went to get her insurance details, only for her mother to get out and up in my face, screaming at me to, "Get back in your fucking car and get the fuck out of here!" I panicked and did just that. FML

#18091969
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14467) - you deserved it (35352)

On 10/27/2011 at 9:22pm - misc - by Benjamin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I finally gathered up the guts to say hi to the girl I like. As I was walking down the hallway, I saw her and waved hello, only to walk into a bathroom door. FML

#18061618
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28128) - you deserved it (5611)

On 10/24/2011 at 6:07am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, marks the fourth straight night that my girlfriend has screamed and cried in fear, scratching and kicking me in her sleep. The reason? I took her to see Paranormal Activity 3. FML

#18061589
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16002) - you deserved it (47986)

On 10/24/2011 at 5:47am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: