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nightwolf240

Offline (the 04/20/2015 at 2:37pm) | Search for a member

nightwolf240

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  • Number of visits : 639
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nightwolf240's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonalds but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML

#21393641
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27936) - you deserved it (2208)

On 04/14/2015 at 5:17pm - kids - by Pandistoteles - United States

Today, my 13-year-old sister told me that she wants to get pregnant soon to stop her periods for a while. I can't believe we're related. FML

#21393492
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30615) - you deserved it (2397)

On 04/14/2015 at 11:49am - health - by TheGoodSister - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, while walking down the street, a cute guy approached me. We ended up having some drinks then heading back to his place and hooked up. Afterwards, I used the bathroom, and when I came out, he was going through his wallet and asked me how much he owed me. FML

#21391926
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30610) - you deserved it (9340)

On 04/11/2015 at 6:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I bought a garden gnome to spice up my lawn. Tonight, someone threw it right through my living room window. Not only will the repairs cost a ton, my neighbor keeps saying stupid shit to me, like "You must be shattered" and "Looks like you ain't got a window gnome... more." FML

#21391420
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26588) - you deserved it (2855)

On 04/10/2015 at 6:17pm - misc - by dickhead (woman) - United States

Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML

#21390758
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27781) - you deserved it (4596)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got hit by a car. Not a real one, though; my sister thought it would be funny to take her RC car and smash it over my head as hard as she could. FML

Today, my brother in law brought a dead rabbit to my nephew saying, "I found the Easter Bunny!" My nephew started crying hours ago and hasn't stopped. FML

#21388202
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28520) - you deserved it (2162)

On 04/05/2015 at 6:19pm - animals - by :O - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my parents, my aunt and her husband went out to dinner. There, my aunt told us that she was pregnant, and out of instinct, I asked her who the father is. FML

#21387788
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24757) - you deserved it (14661)

On 04/04/2015 at 11:06pm - kids - by TKPhai - United States (California)

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44224) - you deserved it (2942)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML

#21382327
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28423) - you deserved it (3026)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:29am - kids - by njh - Ireland

Today, I tore my ACL while doing physical therapy that's supposed to keep me from tearing my ACL. FML

#21381900
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31363) - you deserved it (2232)

On 03/26/2015 at 2:36pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, three of my dipshit coworkers kept whining all day about Zayne Malik leaving One Direction, how devastating it is, and what it means for their future. As a pacifist, I've never had to struggle so hard to not beat the piss out of people and hurl their broken remains out a window. FML

#21381305
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30453) - you deserved it (4348)

On 03/25/2015 at 3:00pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

#21369938
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32591) - you deserved it (3038)

On 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by killme (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my son was at a birthday party. After eating a plate of cake, he loudly asked the birthday boy's mum if he could have sloppy seconds. I don't know where he heard that phrase, but the other kids' parents shot me very dirty looks. FML

#21369892
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27528) - you deserved it (2898)

On 03/07/2015 at 11:59am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I watched in horror from the doorway as my brother furiously scratched at his greasy hair and ate the large flakes of dead skin that came loose from his scalp. I think our real dad might be caged in a zoo somewhere. FML

#21369858
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27050) - you deserved it (2080)

On 03/07/2015 at 10:58am - misc - by GROSS (woman) - Bangladesh



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