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nightwolf240

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nightwolf240

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  • Number of visits : 217
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nightwolf240's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of nightwolf240's badges

nightwolf240's favorite FMLs

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43749) - you deserved it (8480)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

#21245365
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30209) - you deserved it (3773)

On 08/25/2014 at 9:03pm - love - by byebyeromance (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it's been almost a week since I returned from my vacation to Ireland. Before I rarely drank. Now I'm pretty sure I'm an alcoholic. You might think I'm joking, but I've woken up hungover every day since I landed there. I basically paid to kill my liver and become AA's next poster child. FML

#21245034
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25343) - you deserved it (14034)

On 08/25/2014 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that the reason my boyfriend hasn't texted me recently is that he'd forgotten he was dating anyone. FML

#21244761
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37179) - you deserved it (4397)

On 08/24/2014 at 11:27pm - love - by angry girlfriend - United States (Indiana)

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37069) - you deserved it (6990)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I overheard my dad say "Last time I didn't use a condom, I ended up with Steven, so for god's sake use 'em." I'm Steven. FML

#21244545
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34957) - you deserved it (2768)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML

#21243667
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31318) - you deserved it (21583)

On 08/23/2014 at 8:28am - work - by in big trouble - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online. It wasn't me. And when I finally got him to give me the web address, I too started crying at the realization of how fat he thinks I am. FML

#21243572
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42526) - you deserved it (4114)

On 08/23/2014 at 2:26am - intimacy - by confidence taken - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

#21241441
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39284) - you deserved it (5290)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Mia (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

#21241406
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61783) - you deserved it (4086)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:15am - health - by BagelTheOtaku (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41131) - you deserved it (15208)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML

#21240474
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30719) - you deserved it (13594)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm - misc - by FANZZY - United States (New York)

Today, I listened to a little girl explain how her scabs taste great with lemon juice. FML

#21240451
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38481) - you deserved it (3509)

On 08/18/2014 at 11:13am - kids - by Stellarum (woman) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML

#21239720
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40041) - you deserved it (5604)

On 08/17/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by ugh thanks - United States (Ohio)



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