About nightbirdblue : I had some great statement to say about FML earlier, but i forgot it.
nightbirdblue's FML badges
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nightbirdblue's favorite FMLs
by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, it's been 10 days since my family and I have been visiting France. I've always wanted to try their culinary specialties but my dad says we "can't trust them". We've eaten at McDonald's 9/10 times. FML
by theshire / 08/12/2014 at 2:23am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Health
Today, my coworkers and I were comparing the backgrounds we have on our phones. They pretty much sum up our love lives; everyone else's background is a photo of their boyfriend or girlfriend. Mine's a photo of a lifeless desert. FML
by Fennec / 08/11/2014 at 3:05pm / Love
by weirded out / 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, my psychotic step-dad asked me if I'm doing drugs. I replied with a massive amount of sarcasm: "Yeah, all of 'em. Especially meth." He flipped out, searched my room top to bottom, then grounded me "for good" until I tell him where I hid the supposed drugs. FML
by Anonymous / 08/09/2014 at 1:32pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids
by Anonymous / 08/09/2014 at 9:31am / United States (Ohio) / Kids
Today, I went to a coworker's wedding. Instead of getting to celebrate their marriage, we spent most of the service being lectured by the priest on how women are a freak by-product of "God's masterpiece design" and are the cause of all the world's problems. FML
by Anonymous / 08/09/2014 at 4:56am / Malawi / Miscellaneous
Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML
by sirphilmckraken / 08/08/2014 at 1:30pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
by screwed / 08/08/2014 at 8:26am / Australia (Western Australia) / Health
by Anonymous / 08/04/2014 at 7:04pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by fatty magoo / 07/29/2014 at 2:20pm / United States (Washington) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 07/27/2014 at 10:48pm / United States (California) / Work
by Yeppets / 07/27/2014 at 2:44pm / United States / Love
Today, my girlfriend came back from camping with her friends. I say "friends", I mean "friend". And when I say "friend", I mean "her ex". I took a look through her bag afterwards, and well, who knew condoms were considered camping equipment these days. FML
by fingwhore / 07/27/2014 at 1:12pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
Today, I had to go to the hospital to get blood taken. The nurse mentioned how pronounced and easy to see my veins are. I guess that explains why she missed five times in a row. I'm surprised my arm doesn't look like a heroin addict's right now. FML
by Anonymous / 07/27/2014 at 12:13pm / United States (New York) / Health
- Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, it was possibly the best sex in our 3 year relationship.… Today, or rather the other night, I had sex with my crush. The only problem is that I got blackout… Today, I was hit on by a really cute guy. It was flattering, but I'm gay so I told him, "Sorry, I'm…