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nicopo

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nicopo

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1971
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Visits<b>ZogerOx</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 11:01am<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 6:48pm<b>leahb99</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 1:27am<b>lunacadence</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:11pm<b>imbatmanfir</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 1:19am<b>theinformer</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:38pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 8:08pm<b>carleybeak</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 9:40am<b>aa1717</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:19pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 10:18am<b>hatrickpatrick13</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 4:45am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 6:23pm<b>datine22</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 7:42pm<b>olpally</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:11am<b>Sporkly</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 10:27pm<b>jonathan896</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 11:59pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 12:46pm<b>anne90210</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 1:03am

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nicopo's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35186) - you deserved it (55428)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

#21139824
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42187) - you deserved it (15797)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, three different strangers stopped me on the street and asked if I was Brad Pitt. Either there's some kind of conspiracy going on, or I'm the world's ugliest woman. FML

#21137630
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52671) - you deserved it (5178)

On 05/12/2014 at 10:38am - misc - by Lookalike (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML

#21137065
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51965) - you deserved it (7200)

On 05/11/2014 at 8:14pm - love - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, I walked outside to see my boyfriend standing on my porch, looking confused. He explained to me that he had attached a prom proposal note to his pet rabbit, and let it inside my house to find me. We went looking for said rabbit, and found my dog halfway through eating it. FML

#21136990
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52716) - you deserved it (4920)

On 05/11/2014 at 6:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52264) - you deserved it (19077)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while at a restaurant with my husband for our 4-year anniversary, he kept behaving strangely, breathing deeply and eventually sighing happily. I thought the wine had just gone to his head. Nope; he proudly admitted later that he'd jerked off without anyone noticing, even me. FML

#21126320
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43735) - you deserved it (4993)

On 04/29/2014 at 2:48pm - misc - by god (woman) - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

#21116666
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40514) - you deserved it (7971)

On 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that the April Fool's Day prank my girlfriend and best friend played on me was not a joke, and that they actually did sleep together. FML

#21111038
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46836) - you deserved it (3505)

On 04/12/2014 at 12:01pm - misc - by gullible (man) - United States

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML

#21110801
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52610) - you deserved it (7741)

On 04/12/2014 at 1:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65410) - you deserved it (32757)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46410) - you deserved it (8728)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML



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