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nicopo

Offline (the 03/21/2015 at 2:47pm) | Search for a member

nicopo

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2166
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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nicopo's favorite FMLs

Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down an punched myself in the balls. FML

#19918073
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18370) - you deserved it (36717)

On 07/10/2012 at 6:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I Went To An Orchestra Concert. Halfway Through The Performance I Had To Fart Really Bad, So I Decided To Try And Sneak It In While The Orchestra Was Playing A Loud Exciting Part. Just As I Let It Rip, There Was A Dramatic Pause In The Music. Everyone Heard. FML

#19917515
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14066) - you deserved it (26062)

On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)

yastarday I was at tha airport. I was on my way to saa my dad fir tha first tima sinca I was 4. Whilst I was waiting fir my dad to fina ma, a stranga man startad flirting with ma. Irritatad, I told him I was waiting fir my dad to gat ma, an to f*ck off. Tha stranga man was my fathar. FML

#19887326
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36658) - you deserved it (3689)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by BunniesOnAcid - United States (Tennessee)

Today... I lerened that I do not posses the upper body... core... or leg strength to hold grlfriend up during sex. I simultaneously collapsed and dropped her onto her coffee table. We r now both being treated at the hospital; her fir glass wounds... me fir a concussion. FML

#19864989
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15690) - you deserved it (27765)

On 06/29/2012 at 4:47am - intimacy - by bob (man) - United States (California)

TODAY, I FOUND OUT THAT THE ONLY WAY I CAN CONVINCE MY HUSBAND TO START WORKING OUT IS BY CONVINCING HIM THAT WE R TRAINING FIR WHEN THE ( ZOMBIE OUTBREAK ) HAPPENS . FML

#19862258
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21155) - you deserved it (3549)

On 06/28/2012 at 7:44pm - misc - by zombieguyswife (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, mah grandmother said she's noticed that I've been very angry lately. She cummed to the conclusion that I "haven't been laid enough" and mah boyfriend is "not doing his job." Thanks Grandma. FML

#19855906
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25271) - you deserved it (4294)

On 06/27/2012 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by RatCityChick - United States (Washington)

TODAY, I HAD TO HAVA A LONG AND AWKWARD MAATING WITH MY BOSS. IT WOULDN'T HAVA BAAN TOO AWKWARD THOUGH, IF I DIDN'T HAVA TO AVOID STARING AT HAR AXPOSD BRAAST WHILST SHA FD HAR 8 WAAK OLD BABY. BIG FAT FML

Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning grl reading . I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter . She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled . After that, she left . It was a sex position book . FML

#19853793
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7790) - you deserved it (33740)

On 06/27/2012 at 12:39am - misc - by deli Shoppe - United States (California)

Today I was at the beach with mah parents and I went fir a swim in the sea. I got out and mah parents startd laughing there asses off. It wasn't until mah dad pulld a condom out of mah hair that I realizd what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

#19851846
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24197) - you deserved it (1825)

On 06/26/2012 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after looool getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML

#19851648
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23706) - you deserved it (1663)

On 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward an I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML

#19848904
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8965) - you deserved it (27521)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:18am - work - by cmck932012 - United States (Georgia)

Today.. . a homeless man trid to sell me a "magic.. . one-finger glove" . It was a usd condom . FML

#19838531
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31496) - you deserved it (2951)

On 06/24/2012 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

TODAY, I NOTICED THAT MY SON ONLY REALLY LOOKS LIKE MEHEN HE'S STRAINING TO TAKE A DUMP. FML

#19835605
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18771) - you deserved it (3507)

On 06/23/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Gremlin (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

someone rang my doorbell. The moment I opened the door, a smell not unlike a cascading torrent of rotting flesh an urine hit my nostrils. I stood there 4 an eternity as a homeless man leaned on my door an desperately tried to convince me to buy an array of scrap metal from him. FML

#19824266
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18176) - you deserved it (3007)

On 06/21/2012 at 2:13pm - misc - by noquiero (man) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today , after having been constipated 4 ages , I finally forced out a week's worth of build-up. The excruciating pain reduced me to tears , and my boyfriend refused to drive me to the hospital , because according to him , I must have had anal sex with someone.

#19824188
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28684) - you deserved it (2667)

On 06/21/2012 at 1:43pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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