Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nicopo

Offline (the 01/27/2015 at 4:53pm) | Search for a member

nicopo

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1799
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nicopo's page activity

Visits<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 6:48pm<b>leahb99</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 1:27am<b>lunacadence</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 11:11pm<b>imbatmanfir</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 1:19am<b>theinformer</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:38pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 8:08pm<b>carleybeak</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 9:40am<b>aa1717</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:19pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 10:18am<b>hatrickpatrick13</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 4:45am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 6:23pm<b>datine22</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 7:42pm<b>olpally</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:11am<b>Sporkly</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 10:27pm<b>jonathan896</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 11:59pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 12:46pm<b>anne90210</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 1:03am<b>JillianBall</b> - the 07/10/2013 at 2:08pm

nicopo's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of nicopo's badges

nicopo's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my twenty-first birthday, and a couple of friends took me out to celebrate. After ordering us shots throughout the night, my friends took off abruptly, leaving me with my very first bar tab. FML

Today, I was on the bus when I felt a big yawn coming on, one so big that my mouth stretched and my eyes closed. It was at this point that the strange man beside me decided to lean over at lightning speed and put his tongue in my mouth. Technically it was my first kiss. I'm 21 years old. FML

#20014909
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41843) - you deserved it (4802)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

#20012782
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29841) - you deserved it (16421)

On 08/10/2012 at 1:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I went out with a friend to grab some food and we were served by this really cute and fun waiter. Stepping out of my comfort zone and deciding to do something crazy, I left my phone number on the bill. I got home only to realize that I forgot to pay the bill. FML

#20011112
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15690) - you deserved it (20347)

On 08/09/2012 at 7:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found one of my mom's old diaries that dated back to my infant days. I couldn't help but read a little. I'm now in great concern over how many times my mom wrote that she wanted to dunk me in the toilet or throw me against a wall. FML

#20010632
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23137) - you deserved it (3454)

On 08/09/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my soon-to-be stepson, 13, decided that he and I needed to spend "more quality time" together. His idea? We should start "bonding" by taking a bath together. When I said no, he told me I was being unfair, and that if I really loved him, I'd do it. FML

#19999925
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29356) - you deserved it (2284)

On 08/03/2012 at 4:21am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I met my boyfriend's grandma for the first time. Trying to make a good impression, I offered to wash the dishes. I accidentally broke the faucet. FML

#19994302
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20718) - you deserved it (3055)

On 07/31/2012 at 10:28am - misc - by gmd05 (woman) - United States

Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML

#19991658
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34645) - you deserved it (5184)

On 07/29/2012 at 11:24pm - misc - by guy - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML

#19981127
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25201) - you deserved it (2016)

On 07/24/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by Uncircumcised Penis - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while at work, a lady with a mustache came in and told me she was lost. I was happy to help, but could not stop rubbing my nose due to allergies. As she left she said, "I know I have a mustache you little ass" and stormed out. FML

#19943603
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26386) - you deserved it (2501)

On 07/16/2012 at 12:08am - work - by crazyautio - United States

Today, when I woke up, I noticed something crawling on my bed. A white faced wasp was dragging the corpse of a rather large spider. I'm not sure what I was more disturbed about; the fact that the wasp was dragging something twice its size, or that these bugs even live in my house. FML

#19942968
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23951) - you deserved it (1802)

On 07/15/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by klanciee - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

#19928978
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33456) - you deserved it (2846)

On 07/12/2012 at 4:35pm - misc - by LetItRip - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down and punched myself in the balls. FML

#19918073
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18337) - you deserved it (36668)

On 07/10/2012 at 6:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML

#19917515
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13179) - you deserved it (24723)

On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at the airport. I was on my way to see my dad for the first time since I was 4. Whilst I was waiting for my dad to find me, a strange man started flirting with me. Irritated, I told him I was waiting for my dad to get me, and to f*ck off. The strange man was my father. FML

#19887326
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36218) - you deserved it (3653)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by BunniesOnAcid - United States (Tennessee)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: