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nicolecherrycola

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nicolecherrycola
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 6 April 1997 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 45
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About nicolecherrycola : ;D

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nicolecherrycola's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43488) - you deserved it (4928)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I used my vaporiser to make my house smell like lavender while I went to work. My brother thought it would be funny to pee inside it. My whole house now smells like pissy lavender. FML

#20993906
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35305) - you deserved it (2889)

On 12/15/2013 at 9:04pm - kids - by lavenderpiss (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

#20992325
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42907) - you deserved it (7376)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28835) - you deserved it (13483)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

#20965644
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53384) - you deserved it (11418)

On 11/21/2013 at 11:10am - misc - by smooth (man) - United States

Today, my mom got drunk at our family reunion and told everyone how worried she is that my "excessive masturbation" would damage the nerves in both my dick and arm. FML

#20939123
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42868) - you deserved it (7340)

On 10/30/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by goodgrief (man) - United States (California)

Today, I reminded my husband that I was on my period, so he wouldn't try to fool around with me. A few hours later, his goldfish-like memory kicked in and he stuck his hand down my pants while we were going to bed. I was wearing a maxi pad. FML

#20935542
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49919) - you deserved it (4689)

On 10/27/2013 at 11:26am - intimacy - by SharkWeek (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML

#20908628
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43591) - you deserved it (5177)

On 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by -____- (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my purse was stolen from my bag while I was on the train. The thief will be surprised to find that it wasn't my money purse, but in fact my "period purse". Hope they find tampons useful. FML

#20906908
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47011) - you deserved it (3962)

On 10/04/2013 at 5:39am - misc - by haveahappyperiod (woman) -

Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML

#20900063
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42154) - you deserved it (3986)

On 09/29/2013 at 1:45am - misc - by -__-" - United States (Washington)

Today, at work, a lady came in to have her glasses fixed. When she opened her case, an earwig crawled out. Instead of trying to kill it, she just left it and watched as it crawled over my desk and behind my computer. I later found the earwig in my hair. FML

#20899979
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39768) - you deserved it (4372)

On 09/29/2013 at 12:16am - work - by browngirl - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I texted a cute picture of my boyfriend and me to my mom, who lives very far away. She replied saying that my Photoshop skills are great, but that I don't need to go so far to pretend that anyone would date me, and that there's no shame in being single at 25. FML

#20899972
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40965) - you deserved it (2573)

On 09/29/2013 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, we got my dad an iPad for his birthday. I had to repeatedly reassure him that he could in fact touch the screen without being shocked. FML

#20899491
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35522) - you deserved it (3425)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

#20097870
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23594) - you deserved it (3106)

On 10/02/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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