nickreymann

Search for a member

Offline (the 08/25/2015 at 7:01pm)

nickreymann

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 355
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

nickreymann's page activity

Visits<b>royr7395</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 2:57am<b>vampire2244</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:34am<b>boobear511</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 2:59pm<b>SailorKirsty</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 3:48am<b>alligator729</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 8:29pm<b>kevinhenning</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 4:49pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 5:06pm

nickreymann's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of nickreymann's badges

nickreymann's favorite FMLs

Today, I was reading butthurt comments about how girl gamers can easily get dates and find love by simply existing. I'm a "girl gamer" who hasn't even found a date, let alone love. I've been looking since I was sixteen. I'm now 27. FML

by AgentRarity / 06/18/2014 at 12:48pm / Love

Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML

by richkief76 / 05/09/2011 at 10:34pm / Kids

Today, I decided to go down on my girlfriend. In the midst of her orgasm, she grabbed my head with her legs, performing a submission most UFC fighters could be proud of, and she held on for so long that I was suffocated. FML

by kingpin7 / 03/30/2011 at 12:43am / United States / Intimacy

Today, at my wedding, my brother decided it would be funny to trip me as I was walking down the aisle, in front of hundreds of people. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2011 at 3:44am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. FML

by CandyMachine / 02/16/2011 at 6:58pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have a condition that, when I pull my foreskin back, it looks as if a rubber band has been put on it. The doctor told me the only way to fix it was to have me circumcised. My mum laughed, then asked him if he had a magnifying lens to do it. FML

by Anonymous / 02/16/2011 at 7:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

by Malakai / 02/02/2011 at 12:57am / United States / Kids

Today, I asked my boyfriend if my ass looked big in my new jeans. He looked, and then started singing "I like big butts and I cannot lie". FML

Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML

by asdfghjkl / 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

by mrdentist / 12/02/2010 at 8:20am / Love

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML

by blackitalian / 11/26/2010 at 10:43am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I danced with a girl until the bar closed. We went back to my place. She had a penis. FML

by Noname / 01/22/2009 at 6:27pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love