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nichyournot

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nichyournot

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  • Number of visits : 740
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nichyournot's FML badges

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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nichyournot's favorite FMLs

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79826) - you deserved it (8245)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I showed my aunt and mother my tattoo. They both burst out laughing. FML

#20562807
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13135) - you deserved it (31130)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by anon - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, I had to present a project for my science class. I began explaining my project; looking at all the bored people, I got incredibly nervous. My nervousness then caused me to laugh hysterically, causing my classmates to laugh. My teacher felt sorry for me and told me to sit down. FML

Today, my husband called me, saying he was in the hospital with a friend who'd just broken his arm. Too bad I then heard a female voice in the background mutter, "She'll never buy that". FML

#20562542
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55734) - you deserved it (3775)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:55pm - love - by soontobesingle (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I was violently throwing up due to severe morning sickness. My boyfriend looked at me, then turned and walked away. In the end, my daughter gave me some paper towel and her juice. My 18-month-old is more supportive of my pregnancy than her 30-year-old father. FML

#20562509
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37719) - you deserved it (5530)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by InfamousLastWord (woman) - United States

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML

#20562430
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48627) - you deserved it (5563)

On 03/27/2013 at 2:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML

#20562346
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68097) - you deserved it (10195)

On 03/27/2013 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

#20561915
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37442) - you deserved it (17433)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:04am - health - by first time at McDonald's in months... - United States

Today, a man attempted to sue my business for giving him food poisoning. I make soap. When I called the cops on him for disturbing the peace, I was told, "Maybe next time you'll put 'not edible' on your label." FML

#20561443
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32030) - you deserved it (3295)

On 03/26/2013 at 8:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my German Shepherd decided to bark at, then attack, a painted rock. At least I know I'm protected from inanimate objects. FML

#20561241
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27354) - you deserved it (3093)

On 03/26/2013 at 5:17pm - animals - by whykarma (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. I was woken up by my mother breaking into my house to tell me I need to get ready for work. Then she got mad that I had a girl over. I'm 20. FML

#20561180
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37875) - you deserved it (4628)

On 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by holycommander - United States

Today, after my boyfriend promised he wasn't cheating on me, I ran into him at our favorite coffee shop with the girl I suspected him of cheating with. When I confronted them, he acted like he didn't know me. FML

#20561087
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47745) - you deserved it (3901)

On 03/26/2013 at 3:04pm - love - by Megan - United States

Today, after getting a new haircut, I decided to take a few photos. I set up my iPhone in my room and began posing. It wasn't until numerous shots later that I realized my phone had posted every picture to Facebook, and they were all over everyone's newsfeed. FML

#20561054
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16129) - you deserved it (41047)

On 03/26/2013 at 2:31pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML

#20544337
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47225) - you deserved it (2998)

On 03/15/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by guy - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dad has been hitting the bottle, and will only respond to anything I say in a slurred rap. FML

#20539367
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27174) - you deserved it (2649)

On 03/11/2013 at 10:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)



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