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nicacherrycola's FML badges
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nicacherrycola's favorite FMLs
Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML
by fuck / 04/20/2012 at 10:48pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, I blurted out something like "humdidumdum erm lalala" in public, attracting mystified stares. The thing is, I do this every time I remember something embarrassing I've said or done in the past, in an attempt to erase it out of my consciousness. So it happens a lot. FML
by Ashamed / 04/20/2012 at 3:34am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Were do we go... / 04/15/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/14/2012 at 7:10am / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Love
Today, I woke up to the sight of a zucchini and a condom on my bedside table, along with a note saying "I know it's tough being single." Apparently my mom has boundary issues, my dad will laugh at anything, and the fact I just got dumped means nothing. FML
by Madeline Lee / 04/09/2012 at 5:34pm / France (Aquitaine) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend gave me a $100 gift card for Victoria's Secret. Suspicious, I checked the receipt he'd left in the bag. Turns out he had bought it during the 2 weeks we were broken up for some other girl who rejected him, so decided to give it to me instead. FML
by Anonymous / 04/08/2012 at 8:13pm / United States (California) / Love
by IloveJapan / 04/02/2012 at 10:02am / Japan / Love
by a / 03/29/2012 at 11:19am / United States / Miscellaneous
by CallaC / 03/14/2012 at 10:01pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous
by daddy-o / 03/14/2012 at 3:51am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
by Gothicbunnyx3 / 02/20/2012 at 8:43pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, it's been one week since my demented grandma babysat my five-year-old daughter while my husband took me to a fancy restaurant. Now she's taken to screaming and calling me a "damn commie" whenever I discipline or say no to her. FML
by Anonymous / 02/17/2012 at 7:58pm / United States / Kids
Today, I went to an extended family reunion. I started chatting to my great grandpa, and he asked me what I do for a living. Before I could tell him I breed animals, my visibly drunk dad interrupted and slurred, "Oh, she jacks things off. Horses, pigs, just about anything, really." FML
by -_- / 02/17/2012 at 7:13pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/15/2012 at 12:18am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm / India / Intimacy
- Today, I was told I'd need thousand-pound surgery to correct my spinal issue. Tomorrow, my medical… Today, I cursed out my apartment management for messing up my electrical wiring. I had to call and… Today, I work as a cashier at McDonalds. Some guy came in and ordered a $1.50 coffee and payed with…