Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nic5x

Online | Search for a member

nic5x

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 December 1991 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1284
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nic5x's page activity

Visits<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:44pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 6:21pm<b>lizard365</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 1:32am<b>mwhahahahahaha</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 10:00am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 8:18am<b>ironfey</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 10:22am<b>nigtwit</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 1:20am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 1:46pm<b>sarcasticlover</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 9:19am<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 7:19pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 10:09pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 1:31pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 10:58am<b>SoliDSt33L</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 10:08pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 10:44am

nic5x's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of nic5x's badges

nic5x's favorite FMLs

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

#21282836
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22770) - you deserved it (2237)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to write, "Do not use to freeze cat," on my bag of ice because my sister's cat died, and she refuses to bury it. FML

#21275907
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28641) - you deserved it (2325)

On 10/11/2014 at 11:14pm - animals - by MrG - United States

Today, my boyfriend has chipped his front teeth for the third time in 2 months. After refusing to tell me how this keeps on happening, I walked in on him throwing his phone in the air and trying to catch it in his mouth. FML

#21261750
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (200) - you deserved it (4241)

On 09/20/2014 at 11:03am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, in astronomy class, a kid used Uranus in a hilarious innuendo. I was the only one who laughed. I also happen to be the teacher. FML

#21260699
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33465) - you deserved it (5690)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:20pm - misc - by immature - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

#21249886
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32963) - you deserved it (2784)

On 09/01/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by s0728 - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40845) - you deserved it (9483)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50616) - you deserved it (9733)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

#21244154
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38436) - you deserved it (3057)

On 08/24/2014 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad stopped me mid-sentence and said he wanted to punch me in the face and set me on fire for using the word "selfie". FML

#21243189
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21898) - you deserved it (37858)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40418) - you deserved it (25485)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went for a romantic, anniversary meal with my wife. It was amazing, until we had to rush home halfway through because our daughter rang, informing us that her 20-year-old sister had broken her wrist trying to jump from the roof, onto the trampoline and into the pool. She 'miscalculated'. FML

#21230823
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39737) - you deserved it (3242)

On 08/06/2014 at 9:21am - kids - by We raised that fool (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

Today, I had to take a splinter out of my eight year old son's penis. FML

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: