nevershoutkendal

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nevershoutkendal

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 2 December 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2452
  • Number of comments : 1037
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About nevershoutkendal : Okay. Well my name is spelled Kendall. With two L's. I was over the character limit. One of my long-term goals is to become a part of MENSA. I know it sounds cliche, but I am a hell of a lot more mature than most fourteen year olds. Don't let the age fool you.

And ignore my username, I hate crappy teen wannabe indie music. I made this account too long ago...anyways.

NOTICE: If you're here because you don't like something I've said...I want you to write it down on a piece of paper...okay, now put it in an envelope. Now, set fire to it. That's all, folks.

nevershoutkendal's page activity

Visits<b>Infamous_Pickle</b> - yesterday at 1:58am<b>Jaydeisel</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 11:12pm<b>Roxas_hearts</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 6:28pm<b>lexdaflexa</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 9:30pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 2:37am<b>krazy789</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 3:00pm<b>jill97</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 5:57am<b>Sunflora219</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 1:02pm<b>samrompain</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 9:07pm<b>racerboy102</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 11:35pm<b>Myorafield</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 1:58am<b>tdog150</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 7:57am<b>Curls4life</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 4:52am<b>Bibblejomin</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 7:44pm<b>teacupofsunshine</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 12:41am<b>pumpkinlamps</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 6:03pm<b>Roozb</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 6:43pm<b>jackipdoc</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 5:20pm

Fucked!<b>Roozb</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 12:43am<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 6:20am<b>macironicheez</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 4:13am

nevershoutkendal's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of nevershoutkendal's badges

nevershoutkendal's favorite FMLs

Today, my vegan girlfriend refused to give me a blowjob because, apparently, blowjobs aren't vegan. FML

by ihateveganism / 08/22/2012 at 12:19am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that two kids were able to, without much effort, convince my 16-year-old daughter that her friend's house was used to smuggle out Jews during WWII. His house was built in 2007. We also live in America. FML

by Jessica / 08/21/2012 at 4:21am / United States / Kids

Today, my girlfriend decided that having OCD will help her lose weight. She is now convinced that walking in and out of doorways multiple times will burn fat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2012 at 2:31am / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Health

Today, I had to go down to the county police department to bail out my kids who thought it would be a good idea to try mugging an ice cream truck driver. FML

by Demetria / 08/20/2012 at 6:02pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I watched as some idiot made a bad U-turn and I laughed. I then turned into another car. FML

by LOLOLOLOL / 08/20/2012 at 4:55am / United States (North Carolina) / Transportation

Today, in the middle of the store, my daughter pointed at my belly and loudly announced that she was going to have a brother. I'm a man, and apparently I need to lose weight. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2012 at 1:30am / United States / Kids

Today, at the water park, my grandmother's boob slipped out. Every time I close my eyes, I see her dangling breast in my mind. FML

by JMG / 08/19/2012 at 1:25am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at the water park, my grandmother's boob slipped out. Every time I close my eyes, I see her dangling breast in my mind. FML

by JMG / 08/19/2012 at 1:25am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2012 at 5:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it's garbage day. My mom accidentally threw away a receipt she needed to return something and told me to go get it. While I was looking for it, a cop gave me hell for "stealing recyclables on private property." This all happened in my front lawn. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2012 at 2:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

by mikeissad / 08/11/2012 at 3:37pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was speaking to my mother on the phone, when she mentioned that my dad had surprised her last week with a pearl necklace. Before I could quite grasp what was going on, I'd popped a boner and visualised the scene. What the hell is wrong with me? FML

by clayton / 07/27/2012 at 8:30pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house when we noticed her cat was missing. We saw it on the roof and so I thought I would try to look good by offering to go on the roof to retrieve it. The cat had climbed down when I got up there, and I have a fear of heights. Her mom had to help me down. FML

by screw the cat / 07/24/2012 at 1:10am / United States (Utah) / Animals

Today, a male co-worker asked me in what shape I shave my pubic hair. Jokingly, I replied that I have a very nicely trimmed dodecahedron. Now he's telling everyone at work that I have a venereal disease. FML

by butterball / 07/18/2012 at 10:41am / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Work

Today, I woke up to a nude picture of my girlfriend. Once I looked at it my morning wood went away. FML

by bob / 07/03/2012 at 1:33pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy