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nerdtron430

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nerdtron430

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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Up and coming moderator

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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nerdtron430's favorite FMLs

Today, less than a day after my cranky downstairs neighbor passed away, I woke up to banging sounds against his apartment ceiling, like the ones he used to make whenever I walked around during the night. I'm shitting myself in fear. FML

#21161740
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47879) - you deserved it (4468)

On 06/03/2014 at 3:01pm - misc - by mdsfkljsfsdrewr (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, for the first time in my life, my dad said he was proud of me. It meant a lot to me, and I started tearing up. Noticing my emotion, he looked at me pityingly, said "Aaaaand it's gone." and walked out of the room. FML

#21157338
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43850) - you deserved it (6587)

On 05/30/2014 at 5:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I saw a pair of eyes looking at me from my closet. Realizing it must be my cat, I called her. She immediately came out from under my bed. I can't find anything in my closet. FML

#21155508
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63807) - you deserved it (4929)

On 05/29/2014 at 2:46am - animals - by Idk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys got up to get more food, I told them they'd better come back with something green on their plate. They both came back with mint ice cream and got a high-five from my husband. FML

#21154562
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50018) - you deserved it (29846)

On 05/28/2014 at 12:28pm - kids - by outsmartedbykids (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML

#21152151
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50364) - you deserved it (6890)

On 05/26/2014 at 11:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

#21152005
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49804) - you deserved it (5695)

On 05/26/2014 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I saw the script for the end of year assembly skit I'm forced to participate in. Looks like on my last day of high school, I'll be running around in a rainbow unicorn costume in front of my entire high school and their parents. FML

Today, my wife's cat ran away. After spending a lot of money making "Lost Cat" flyers and driving around for hours passing them out and searching for her cat, he walked downstairs. FML

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

Today, my cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

Today, my grandmother told me that since my dad was a mistake, I too am a mistake. FML

#21143150
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48768) - you deserved it (3982)

On 05/17/2014 at 5:56pm - misc - by 2ndgenoration (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my 15-year-old son told me that he and his new girlfriend are deeply in love and are meant for each other. The "girlfriend" in question? My fiancé's 12-year old daughter. FML

#21143037
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50693) - you deserved it (5602)

On 05/17/2014 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, I had to inform a patient that she has an STD. She reacted by kicking me in the nuts. FML

#21140637
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52663) - you deserved it (4673)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:08pm - health - by bruised_scrotum - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, a customer came into our store and asked if we sold "child sized coffins". This isn't even the weirdest question I've been asked. FML

#21140459
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42341) - you deserved it (4519)

On 05/15/2014 at 8:02am - work - by iworkatofficedepothomes (woman) - United States (California)



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