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nerdherd246

Offline (the 03/09/2015 at 3:06pm) | Search for a member

nerdherd246

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  • Number of visits : 69
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nerdherd246's favorite FMLs

Yesterday... mah wife got all excitedhen she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heret to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML

#21137819
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47113) - you deserved it (6128)

On 05/12/2014 at 3:41pm - misc - by Jarool - Canada (Alberta)

my guide dog sneezd so hard that it slammd its head on the floor and knockd itself out . I have to trust this dog with mah life . FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51798) - you deserved it (4534)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today , I asked mah daughter to buy me two pints of milk. Apparently , the shop only had four-pints , so she got that and poured half down the drain. FML

#21099986
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44519) - you deserved it (6436)

On 03/30/2014 at 6:04am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, ( I didn't know how else to kill it! ) She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, putted it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. real FML

#21067130
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49942) - you deserved it (4039)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Yesterday, My Family Got Togeter For A Big Game Of Paintball . My Grandpa Wantd To Play Too, But I Told Im E Was A Bit Too Old For Suc A Roug Sport . He Joind Anyway, And Spent Te Wole 2 Ours Unting My Dumb Ass Down . I'm Now In Constant Pain After Bieng Riddld Wit Paintballs . FML

#20941762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21474) - you deserved it (50370)

On 11/01/2013 at 7:55pm - health - by nl4 (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

2day mah weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist an thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a looool rd laser light through his window. I was on the stairshen he ran past... screaming bloody murder... sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43144) - you deserved it (3183)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

my house was broken into. After we calld the police, my dad startd calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop.

Today, after years of researching an saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal fir three hours before it burrowed under the fence an ran away. FML

#20717566
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35292) - you deserved it (51764)

On 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm - animals - by SadFoxLady (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today I had to re-grade a student's assignments cuz neither he nor his parents can read "Spanish." I'd written in cursive. big fat FML

#19324505
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27713) - you deserved it (3596)

On 03/22/2012 at 1:13am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today... I installd an alarm app on mah phone. Turns out... to unlock the phone and get the ringing to stop... I have to answer a maths question. It took me ten minutes to get it right. FML

#19203971
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11105) - you deserved it (29590)

On 03/02/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by Ashleigh - Australia

Today, I lerend if you've slept with your soon to be step-brother you should tell your family. If you don't, he may blurt it out while drunk at a family barbecue. FML

#18594969
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15653) - you deserved it (38848)

On 12/24/2011 at 1:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

yesterday I found Jesus!! The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on car!! mega FML

#18316439
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34226) - you deserved it (3231)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today.. . at work.. . mah mouse cursor kept randomly moving all over the screen.. . an messed up an entre day's attempted work . As I was leaving.. . I overheard one of mah co-worker saying he'd plugged a wreles mouse adapter into mah computer.. . an had been trolling me all day . FML

#18156228
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35533) - you deserved it (4155)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by tech_support (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

looool Today, I wore mah brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, mah dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought mah chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where yur tits went." FML

#17953738
431 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34678) - you deserved it (24668)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Taday a highly intoxicated man cummed into mah workplace and complained that the medicine that I'd prescribed for his dog almost choked him. I work at Blockbuster. mega FML

#17948173
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27452) - you deserved it (2202)

On 10/09/2011 at 11:30pm - work - by Username - United States (Texas)



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