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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I thought it would be funny if I put a 'Free if Hot-Wired' sign on my friend's car. I guess it worked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6121) - you deserved it (58927)
On 05/09/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by t-dawg (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML
I agree, your life sucks (112278) - you deserved it (9396)
On 05/08/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Oblivious (woman) - Kuwait
Today, I was walking to class with my roommate. She didn't notice the car coming up behind her because her headphones were in. As I pulled her out of the way, she thought I was goofing around and shoved me back... in front of the car. I got hit and rolled off the hood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (93919) - you deserved it (3722)
On 05/07/2009 at 3:11pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Toscana)
Today, I realized my wedding ring was missing. Turns out, my son had taken it to give to a girl he likes in the 2nd grade. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62618) - you deserved it (6197)
On 05/06/2009 at 11:47pm - kids - by fmal (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (84810) - you deserved it (16564)
On 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Familyskank (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21419) - you deserved it (54859)
On 05/04/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21257) - you deserved it (53354)
On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)
Today, while at the bakeshop, I got bored waiting in line so I decided to sit on the glass case protecting cupcakes. Turns out there was no glass. I had to pay $50 to cover all the mess and had to walk out of the bakeshop with icing all over my butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9015) - you deserved it (54524)
On 05/04/2009 at 3:34am - misc - by kandi (woman) - Philippines (Bulacan)
Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (88923) - you deserved it (14370)
On 04/30/2009 at 8:15am - intimacy - by soooyeah (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (153423) - you deserved it (8631)
On 04/28/2009 at 6:13pm - money - by Sad (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, an ant bit my penis. That was the first 'mouth' to ever touch it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80204) - you deserved it (19302)
On 04/27/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by hjgjh - United States (California)
Today, I started my period. I am getting married tomorrow. So, not only am I going to be on my period for my wedding night and honeymoon, my best friend has to help me change my pad because my dress is so big. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64332) - you deserved it (6798)
On 04/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was eating a hamburger on the street when a pigeon came down to take a bite. I ran and got 30 birds or so chasing me. My legs were burning, half of my burger was gone, and an entire office building was laughing at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45060) - you deserved it (6676)
On 04/22/2009 at 6:40am - animals - by fencernick (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I went on somewhat of a blind date. The date was OK until he tried to spoon feed me. This didn't go over so well. Later, I noticed a strange looking brief case he was carrying. I asked him what it was and he whipped out 5 yoyos and did a yoyo show in the middle of the restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52248) - you deserved it (4637)
On 04/22/2009 at 1:24am - misc - by 11321 (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, due to the cold, windy weather, I decided to wear my brand-new cute (and expensive) jacket that has a faux-fur hood. As I walked down the street, numerous PETA members attacked me with red liquid. I'm a Vegan and an animal-rights activist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54245) - you deserved it (20351)
On 04/21/2009 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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