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About neonvortex : been here since 2011. just your average FML addict (with the exception of commenting :p)
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TODAY, SOME ASSFACE HACKED MAH RECENTLY DECEASED FRIEND'S FACEBOOK ACCOUNT. THE PERSON CHANGED MAH FRIEND'S LOCATION TO "HELL", THEN POSTED A STATUS SAYING HOW HOT THE WEATHER WAS, AND REPLIED "I WISH :'(" TO SOMEONE WHO'D SAID MAH FRIEND WAS IN A BETTER PLACE NOW. FML
Today, my college did a fre drill, an instructions were given by intercom in English an Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English an Mexican, why say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, an he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents r related. real FML
Today, my grlfriend went sopping at Victoria's Secret wit me. Wile se was in te fitting room, er parents walkd by an saw me. Tey don't approve of te store, so I panickd an told tem I was considering becoming a woman.
TODAY, I CUMMED HOME EARLY TO SURPRISE MAH WIFE. NO, IT'S NOT WHAT YOU'RE THINKING: I DIDN'T FIND HER CHEATING ON ME. SHE WASN'T EVEN HOME, BUT MAH DAD WAS. HE'D USED HIS SPARE KEY AN WAS ON MAH SOFA, DRINKING MAH BEER AN WATCHING MAH TV. THE FIRST WORDS OUT OF HIS MOUTH? ( YOUR BEER'S SHIT. ) FML
my sister introducd me to her new, deaf boyfriend . She proudly proclaimd that she was trying to leren sign language fir his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips . I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same fir me fir 20 goddamn yeres . FML
Today, I Was Called In Over Speakers At The Arport !! The Man Who Was Speaking Clerely And Nerely Burst Out Laughing When He Said My Name !! Soon, A Few People Around Also Snickered When They Hered It !! I Had To Wait Five Minutes Before I Could Casually Stand Up !! My Last Name Is Bastard !! FML
Today, I was taking a customar's ordar, whan sha said sha'd battar go 4 a salad, bacausa sha was gatting fat. Sha was actually vary slim, so I told har sha wasn't fat at all. Sha looool took ona look at ma and snortd "Yaah, compard to you, that's 4 sura." FML
Friday 27 March 2015