neonvortex

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neonvortex

6Fucked!

neonvortexneonvortex
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12393
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About neonvortex : been here since 2011. just your average FML addict (with the exception of commenting :p)

neonvortex's page activity

Visits<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 1:47am<b>getoffmyscreen</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 9:35pm<b>Karau</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 4:26pm<b>Neut</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 12:29am<b>missa8604</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 11:25pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 7:00am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 10:29pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 3:58am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 4:53pm<b>ananicosia</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 2:35pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 8:50am<b>dirty_dan_</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 6:59pm<b>JMichael</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 11:40pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 2:42pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 8:23pm<b>Saraj07</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 10:56am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 12:15am<b>mckenz1eq</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 10:32pm

Fucked!<b>Toonice45</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 4:59am<b>LilMissCanadian</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 11:33pm<b>DogeDogeDoge</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 2:39am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 6:15pm<b>venomXVII</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 3:25pm<b>olive_r</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:00am

neonvortex's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of neonvortex's badges

neonvortex's favorite FMLs

Today, my father decided it would be a good idea to give me the sex talk, at Target, at the top of his lungs. FML

by tobuscus9412 / 03/21/2015 at 9:04pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was closing up at my sandwich-making job when a huge bus full of basic, snobby, preppy cheerleaders came in. They literally "can't even" decide what they want. FML

by ironfey / 03/20/2015 at 11:38pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids

Today, my maths class and I had to sit through a slideshow of photos of our teacher's cat. The cat's name is Mr Cat. FML

by Anonymous / 03/18/2015 at 5:44am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother wore a T-shirt to my birthday party that said "I dig skinny chicks". I'm a recovering anorexic and told him that I didn't really like his shirt. His response? "Don't let the liberal media brainwash you into thinking it's OK to be fat." FML

by Idigrespectfulattire / 03/17/2015 at 8:18pm / Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain) / Miscellaneous

Today, at Walmart, I overheard a lady telling a teenage girl that the secret to keeping a guy for life is giving him anal, but that it's important to clean your "shitter" beforehand. I can't believe these kinds of sick freaks actually exist. FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2015 at 1:54pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML

by pledonasm / 03/15/2015 at 12:11pm / India (Maharashtra) / Kids

Today, I got a new haircut. I was feeling pretty confident, until coworkers and family members kept making comments like, "I think you gained a little weight", "You look older" and "Do you still like guys?" Apparently, my new haircut changed my waist size and my sexual orientation. FML

by Lovemynewhaircut / 03/10/2015 at 2:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my Dad I was an alcoholic and had decided to seek help. His reply, "Don't stop drinking, you are the life of the party, funny and beautiful when you drink." FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2015 at 8:15am / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

by killme / 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, while chatting with my in-laws, I told them about my upcoming spinal surgery. Soon after, when I went to get us some drinks, I overheard them murmuring about how many surgeries I've already had, how I'm a drain on the healthcare system, and how I should ideally just die. FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2015 at 5:34am / United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of) / Health

Today, my mom found out I'm failing three classes. Now she won't let me go to a convention I bought passes for weeks in advance. Each pass was $45, and I bought 2 more for my friends. You do the math on that, because I apparently can't. FML

by Byepax / 03/06/2015 at 9:20am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife complained that the coffee grounds I swept into the sink grossed her out. Yesterday, I removed several panty-liners from her soiled underwear before doing the laundry. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 8:34pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, during a meal out with my team and bosses, I wasn't drinking. The waiter complained, "If you're not ordering alcohol, how am I supposed to take advantage of you later?" I'm not sure what's worse, the rapey pre-dinner joke or the awkward silence as my colleagues looked on. FML

by pabj208 / 03/05/2015 at 7:07pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after seven people at work approaching me and asking me if I was 'that lad from the paper', I picked one up to see what they were talking about. Turns out my doppelganger is a man who brutally murdered his older brother last year. FML

by definatelynotamurderer / 03/03/2015 at 9:01am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous