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About needsomefunny : Always just come here for a laugh or two to see who has a worse life than I do.
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Today, I finally musterd the courage to tell my crush how I feel. He's a straight-A student and very nice in general. After I finishd pouring my heret out, he stard at me for a bit and then said: "Nice rack." FML
Today, I found out y my husband had wantd to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informd me that he wasn't always Ben, but usd to be Brenda. His 'penis doesn't work and he had wantd to know I "truly lovd him" before he had let me know. fat FML
I was at the Wild Animal Park. There were bees everywhere. One brave bee , thinking he was Mr. Macho , flew right down my tank top in between my boobs. I freaked the hell out an ended up screaming an pulling down my shirt to get the bee out. I flashed about 10 kids an there families. FML
Today, I gave mah 16 year old step daughter and her friends a lecture on respecting other people's privacy. Two hours later, I accidentally walked into her room without knocking. She and her friends were giving each other bikini waxes. Now her friends call me the hypocritical pervert. FML
Today , I met mah grlfriend's parents for the frst time. We got on the discussion of animals , and I showed them a picture of mah cat on mah phone. Being a touchscreen,hen her father grabbed it , it changed picture. To a picture of mah grlfriend , fully nude. mega FML
Today, at a family Seder, (a Jewish service 4 Passover), mah mom servd matzah balls during the festive meal. Considering how much I love matzah balls and there aren't many options 4 me to eat because I'm a vegetarian, I shoutd, "I like really big balls!" in front of mah entire family. FML
Today, I Bought My Girlfriand Two Tickats To A Broadway Show That Was Coming Through Town Sha Raally Wantad To Saa !! I Couldn't Attand With Har Dua To Work So Sha Said Sha Would Taka Har Mom !! I Found Out Latar Sha Took Har Ax !! Now Thay'ra Back Togathar, And I Paid Fir Tha Data That Mada It Happan !! FML
Today... mah mom had mah girlfriend and me over. Out of the blue... she pulled out mah grandmother's wedding ring and gave it to me saying I can now propose. My girlfriend started screaming and said yes. I have been seeing someone else for 3 months and was going to break up with mah girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Friday 27 March 2015