necomni

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necomni

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 20287
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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necomni's page activity

Visits<b>subzero121314</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 12:16am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 5:24pm<b>cebrion</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 12:39pm<b>Scorcher255</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 9:42pm<b>mimihuseen_</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 8:27pm<b>gingalife8991</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 4:31pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 3:26pm<b>Pantalaimon</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 4:49pm<b>spiers1</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 12:35am<b>AllyMoree</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 6:47pm<b>melons</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 5:00pm<b>diving</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 12:20am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:51am<b>TheMisfit</b> - the 10/07/2010 at 11:29am<b>teihas</b> - the 02/09/2010 at 8:48pm<b>2345</b> - the 11/08/2009 at 5:46am<b>Deadjuicy</b> - the 06/16/2009 at 2:12pm<b>sfsdfsf</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 2:33am

necomni's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

necomni's favorite FMLs

Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML

by Ugh / 02/16/2009 at 12:45am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, at the gym, I see a person laying unconscious on the ground with people crowded around. Previously being a lifeguard, and knowing CPR, I ran over and asked a man what happened, preparing to check his vitals. I then realized that the body was a dummy and the employees were doing a drill. FML

by thedullard / 02/16/2009 at 12:35am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a fraternity party, and one of the hosts said over the loudspeaker "turn to the person next to you and picture them naked, then drink a beer if the mental image disturbs you". I turned, only to be face-to-face with my ex-boyfriend. He drank two beers. FML

by Noname / 02/15/2009 at 3:28pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Love

Today, I was trying on lingerie in the dressing room of Victoria’s Secret with my boyfriend next to me. I told my him in a seductive, playful tone “You can stay and watch if you give me a piece of your gum.” He said “No I only have three more” and left the room. FML

by cjk004 / 02/15/2009 at 6:35am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I started a fight at a lesbian bar and lost. I'm a man. FML

by Mofisto / 02/15/2009 at 5:43am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was instructed by my boss to welcome the 2 new foreign business partners since I am the only one who could speak their language. When they arrived I greeted them in their language. One of them scratched his head and asked his companion in plain and clear English, "What did he say?" FML

by Salaryman / 02/15/2009 at 1:21am / Philippines (Rizal) / Work

Today, I was babysitting a 5 year old boy. When I was on the phone with my mom, he called 911 and started to cry. When I got off the phone the police were at the door. It turns out that the "emergency" was that the VCR was not working. FML

by loueb17 / 02/15/2009 at 12:57am / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, I wore the belt that my stepfather has spent 2 months needle pointing, as a finishing touch he added my initials: 'fml'. FML

by MLS / 02/14/2009 at 6:19pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I cancelled out of a video chat with my boyfriend to go take a dump. I took my computer with me to look at Facebook. It took three minutes for me to realize I was still on video chat. FML

by videochat / 02/14/2009 at 6:05pm / United States (Vermont) / Geek

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

by Shamu / 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML

by shit's weak / 02/13/2009 at 4:51pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML

by shit's weak / 02/13/2009 at 4:51pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

by The Sbeak / 02/13/2009 at 10:54am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I had to give a speech on stage at a local preschool about fire safety. I'm 32 years old and passed out on stage because I felt extremely nervous and intimitated by a group of 4 year olds. FML

by buster / 02/13/2009 at 3:06am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

by janedoe / 02/12/2009 at 5:21pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work